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% THROUGH THE 

2 , looking-glass 


AND WHAT ALICE 
rOUND THERE 


LEWIS CARROLL 


WH H ILLUSTRATIONS 


CHICAGO ^ 

W. B. CONKEY COM PAN Y*" 


PUBLISHERS 




3G060 


OibbRf/ of Con^roM 

Two Copies Received 

AUG 18 1900 

Copyright ontry 

SECOND COPY. 

Doliverad to 

OKOER DIVISION, 

a 1900. 


w 


Copyright, 1900, by W, B. Conkey Company. 

*^4360 




Child of the pure unclouded brow 
And dreaming eyes of wonder ! 

Though time be fleet, and I and thou 
Are half a mile asunder, 

Thy loving smile will surely hail 
The love-gift of a fairy-tale. 

I have not seen thy sunny face, 

Nor heard thy silver laughter: 

No thought of me shall find a place 
In thy young life’s hereafter — 

Enough that now thou wilt not fail 
To listen to my fairy-tale. 

A tale begun in other days, 

When summer suns were glowing — 

A simple chime, that served to time 
The rhythm of our rowing — 

Whose echoes live in memory yet. 

Though envious years would say “forget." 

Come, hearken then, ere voice of dread, 
With bitter tidings laden. 

Shall summon to unwelcome bed 
A melancholy maiden ! 

We are but older children, dear. 

Who fret to find our bedtime near. 


5 


Without, the frost, the blinding snow, 
The storm-wind’s moody madness — 
Within, the firelight’s ruddy glow. 
And childhood’s nest of gladness. 
The magic words shall hold thee fast : 
Thou shalt not heed the raving blast. 

And, though the shadow of a sigh 
May tremble through the story. 

For “happy summer days” gone by, 
And vanish’d summer glory — 

It shall not touch, with breath of bale. 
The pleasance of our fairy-tale. 


CONTENTS 


CHAPTEE. PAGE. 

I. Looking-Glass House ii 

II. The Garden of Live Flowers 28 

III. Looking-Glass Insects 42 

IV. Tweedledum and Tweedledee ‘ 55 

V. Wool and Water 72. 

VI. Humpty Dumpty 88 

VII. The Lion and the Unicorn 104 

VIII. “It’s My Own Invention” 118 

IX. Queen Alice 138 

X. Shaking 160 

XI. Waking 161 

XII. Which Dreamed It? 163 


CHRTSTMAS-GREETINGS. 


[from a fairy to a child.] 

Lady, dear, if Fairies may 
For a moment lay aside 

Cunning tricks and elfish play, 

'Tis at happy Christmas-tide. 

We have heard the children say — 
Gentle children, whom we love — 

Long ago, on Christmas Day, 

Came a message from above. 

Still, as Christmas-tide comes round, 
They remember it again — 

Echo still the joyful sound, 

“Peace on earth, good-will to men!” 

Yet the hearts must childlike be 
Where such heavenly guests abide; 

Unto children in their glee. 

All the year is Christmas-tide ! 

Thus, forgetting tricks and play 
For a moment, lady dear. 

We would wish you, if we may. 
Merry Christmas, glad New Year. 

Christmas, 1867. 


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CHAPTER I. 

LOOKING-GLASS HOUSE. 

One thing was certain, that the white kitten 
had had nothing to do with it — it was the black 
kitten’s fault entirely. For the white kitten 
had been having its face washed by the old cat 
for the last quarter of an hour (and bearing it 
pretty well, considering) : so you see that it 
couldn’t have had any hand in the mischief. 

The way Dinah washed her children’s faces 
was this: first she held the poor thing down 
by its ear with one paw, and then with the 
other paw she rubbed its face all over, the 
wrong way, beginning at the nose: and just 
now, as I said, she was hard at work on the 
white kitten, which was lying quite still and 
trying to purr — no doubt feeling that it was all 
meant for its good. 

But the black kitten had been finished with 
earlier in the afternoon, and so, while Alice 
was sitting curled up in a corner of the great 
arm-chair, half talking to herself and half 
asleep, the kitten had been having a grand 
game of romps with the ball of worsted Alice 
had been trying to wind up, and had been roll- 
ing it up and down till it had all come undone 
agiain; and there it was, spread over the hearth 
rug, all knots and tangles, with the kitten run- 
ning after its own tail in the middle. 

11 


12 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


“Oh, you wicked, wicked little thing!” cried 
Alice, catching up the kitten, and giving it a 
little kiss to make it understand that it was in 
disgrace. “Really, Dinah ought to have 
taught you better manners! You ought, 
Dinah, you know you ought!” she added, look- 
ing reproachfully at the old cat, and speaking 
in as cross a voice as she could manage — and 
then she scrambled back into the arm-chair, 
taking the kitten and the worsted with her, 
and began winding up the ball again. But 
she didn’t get on very fast, as she was talking 
all the time, sometimes to the kitten, and 
sometimes to herself. Kitty sat very demurely 
on her knee, pretending to watch the progress 
of the winding, and now and then putting out 
one paw and gently touching the ball, as if it 
would be glad to help if it might. 

“Do you know what to-morrow is, Kitty?” 
Alice began. “You’d have guessed if you’d 
been up in the window with me — only Dinah 
was making you tidy, so you couldn’t. I was 
watching the boys getting in sticks for the 
bonfire — and it wants plenty of sticks, Kitty! 
Only it got so cold, and it snowed so, they had 
to leave off. Never mind, Kitty, we’ll go and 
see the bonfire to-morrow.” Here Alice 
wound two or three turns of the worsted round 
the kitten’s neck, just to see how it would look: 
this led to a scramble, in which the ball rolled 
down upon the floor, and yards and yards of it 
got unwound again. 

“Do you know, I was so angry, Kitty,” Alice 
went on, as soon as they were comfortably 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


13 



settled again, “when I saw all the mischief 
you had been doing, I was very nearly opening 
the window, and putting you out into the snow ! 
And you’d have deserved it, you little mis- 
chievous darling! What have you got to say 
for yourself? Now don’t interrupt me !’ ’ she 
went on, holding up one finger. “I’m going 
to tell you all your faults. Number one: you 


14 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


squeaked twice while Dinah was washing your 
face this morning. Now you can’t deny it, 
Kitty: I heard you! What’s that you say?” 
(pretending that the kitten was speaking). 
‘‘Her paw went into your eye? Well, that’s 
your fault, for keeping your eyes open — if 
you’d shut them tight up, it wouldn’t have 
happened. Now don’t make any more ex- 
cuses, but listen! Number two: you pulled 
Snowdrop away by the tail just as I had put 
down the saucer of milk before her! What, 
you were thirsty, were you? How do you 
know she wasn’t thirsty too? Now for num- 
ber three: you unwound every bit of the 
worsted while I wasn’t looking! 

“That’s three faults, Kitty, and you’ve not 
been punished for any of them yet. You 
know I’m saving up all your punishments for 
Wednesday week — Suppose they had saved up 
all my punishments?” she went on, talking 
more to herself than the kitten. “What would 
they do at the end of a year? I should be sent 
to prison, I suppose, when the day came. Or 
— let me see — suppose each punishment was to 
be going without a dinner: then, when the 
miserable day came, I should have to go with- 
out fifty dinners at once! Well, I shouldn’t 
mind that much! I’d far rather go without 
them than eat them ! 

“Do you hear the snow against the window- 
panes, Kitty? How nice and soft it sounds! 
Just as if some one was kissing the window all 
over outside. I wonder if the snow loves the 
trees and fields, that it kisses them so gently? 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


15 


And then it covers them up snug, you know, 
with a white quilt ; and perhaps it says, ‘Go to 
sleep, darlings, till the summer comes again. ’ 
And when they wake up in the summer, Kitty, 
they dress themselves all in green, and dance 
about — whenever the wind blows — oh, that’s 
very pretty!” cried Alice, dropping the ball of 
worsted to clap her hands. “And I do so wish 
it was true! I’m sure the woods look sleepy 
in the autumn, when the leaves are getting 
brown. 

“Kitty, can you play chess? Now, don’t 
smile, my dear, I’m asking it seriously. 
Because, when we were playing just now, you 
watched just as if you understood it: and when 
I said ‘Check!’ you purred! Well, it was a 
nice check, Kitty, and really I might have 
won, if it hadn’t been for that nasty Knight, 
that came wriggling down among my pieces. 

Kitty, dear, let’s pretend ” And here I 

wish I could tell you half the things Alice used 
to say, beginning with her favorite phrase 
“Let’s pretend.” She had had quite along 
argument with her sister only the day before — 
all because Alice had begun with “Let’s pre- 
tend we’re kings and queens;” and her sister, 
who liked being very exact, had argued that 
they couldn’t, because there were only two of 
them, and Alice had been reduced at last to 
say “Well, you can be one of them, then, and 
I’ll be all the rest.” And once she had really 
frightened her old nurse by shouting suddenly 
in her ear, “Nurse! Do let’s pretend that I’m 
a hungry hyena, and you’re a bone!” 


16 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


But this is taking us away from Alice’s 
speech to the kitten. “Let’s pretend that 
you’re the Red Queen, Ritty! Do you know, 
I think if you sat up and folded your arms, 
you’d look exactly like her. Now do try, 
there’s a dear ! ’ ’ And Alice got the Red Queen 
off the table, and set it up before the kitten as 
a model for it to imitate : however, the thing 
didn’t succeed, principally, Alice said, because 
the kitten wouldn’t fold its arms properly. 
So, to punish it, she held it up to the Looking- 
glass, that it might see how sulky it was, 
“ — and if you’re not good directly, ’’she added, 
“I’ll put you through into Looking-glass 
House. How would you like that? 

“Now, if you’ll only attend, Kitty, and not 
talk so much, I’ll tell you all my ideas about 
Looking-glass House. First, there’s the room 
you can see through the glass — that’s just the 
same as our drawing-room, only the things go 
the other way. I can see all of it when I get 
upon a chair — all but the bit just behind the 
fire-place. Oh ! I do so wish I could see that 
bit! I want so much to know whether they’ve 
a fire in the winter : you never can tell, you 
know, unless our fire smokes, and then smoke 
comes up in that room too — but that may be 
only pretence, just to make it look as if they 
had a fire. Well then, the books are something 
like our books, only the words go the wrong 
way: I know that, because I’ve held up one of 
our books to the glass, and then they hold up 
one in the other room. 

“How would you like to live in Looking- 


17 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 



glass House, Kitty? I wonder if they’d give 
you milk in there? Perhaps Looking-glass 
milk isn’t good to drink — but oh, Kitty! now 
we come to the passage. You can just see a 
little peep of the passage in Looking-glass 
House, if you leave the door of our drawing- 
room wide open : and it’s very like our passage 
as far as you can see, only you know it may be 
quite different on beyond. Oh, Kitty, how 

2 Looking Glass 


18 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 



nice it would be if we could only get through 
into Looking-glass House! I’m sure it’s got, 
oh! such beautiful things in it! Let’s pretend 
there’s a way of getting through into it, some- 
how, Kitty. Let’s pretend the glass has got 
all soft like gauze, so that we can get through. 
Why, it’s turning into a sort of mist now, I 
declare! It’ll be easy enough to get through 
” She was up on the chimney-piece while 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


19 


she said this, though she hardly knew how she 
had got there. And certainly the glass was 
beginning to melt away, just like a Mght sil- 
very mist. 

In another moment Alice was through the 
glass, and had jumped lightly down into the 
Looking-glass room. The very first thing she 
did was to look whether there was a fire in the 
fireplace, and she was quite pleased to find that 
there was a real one, blazing away as brightly 
as the one she had left behind. “So I shall be 
as warm here as I was in the old room,” 
thought Alice: “warmer, in fact, because 
there T1 be no one here to scold me away from 
the fire. Oh, what fun it’ll be, when they see 
me through the glass in here, and can’t get at 
me!” 

Then she began looking about, and noticed 
that what could be seen from the old room was 
quite common and uninteresting, but that all 
the rest was as different as possible. For 
instance, the pictures on the wall next the fire 
seemed to be all alive, and the very clock on 
the chimney-piece (you know you can only see 
the back of it in the Looking-glass) had got 
the face of a little old man, and grinned at 
her. 

“They don’t keep this room so tidy as the 
other,” Alice thought to herself, as she 
noticed several of the chessmen down in the 
hearth among the cinders; but in another 
moment, with a little “Oh!” of surprise, she 
was down on her hands and knees watching 


20 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


them. The chessmen were walking about, two 
and two! 

“Here are the Red King and the Red 
Queen,” Alice said (in a whisper, for fear of 
frightening them), “and there are the White 
King and the White Queen sitting on the edge 
of the shovel — and here are two Castles walk- 
ing arm in arm — I don’t think they can hear 
me,” she went on, as she put her head closer 
down, “and I’m nearly sure they can’t see me. 
I feel somehow as if I was getting invisible 


Here something began squeaking on the 
table behind Alice, and made her turn her head 
just in time to see one of the White Pawns roll 



THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


21 


over and begin kicking ; she watched it with 
great curiosity to see what would happen next. 

“It is the voice of my child !”the White Queen 
cried out, as she rushed past the King, so vio- 
lently that she knocked him over among the 
cinders. “My precious Lily! My imperial kit- 
ten ! ’ ’ and she began scrambling wildly up the 
side of the fender. 

“Imperial fiddlestick!” said the King, rub- 
bing his nose which had been hurt by the fall. 
He had a right to be a little annoyed with the 
Queen, for he was covered with ashes from 
head to foot. 

Alice was very anxious to be of use, and, as 
the poor little Lily was nearly screaming her- 
self into a fit, she hastily picked up the Queen 
and5^?tii1«r on thddJfMe by the side of her noisy 
little daughter. 

The Queen gasped, and sat down ; the rapid 
journey through the air had quite taken away 
her breath, and for a minute or two she could 
do nothing but hug the little Lily in silence. 
As soon as she had recovered her breath a lit- 
tle, she called out to the White King, who was 
sitting sulkily among the ashes, “Mind the 
volcano ! ’ ’ 

“What volcano?” said the King, looking up 
anxiously into the fire, as if he thought that 
was the most likely place to find one. 

“Blew — me — up,” panted the Queen, who 
was still a little out of breath. “Mind you 
come up — the regular way — don’t get blown 
up!” 

Alice watched the White King as he slowly 


22 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


Struggled up from bar to bar, till at last she 
said, “Why, you’ll be hours and hours getting 
to the table, at that rate. I’d far better help 
you, hadn’t I?’’ But the King took no notice 
of the question ; it was quite clear that he could 
neither hear her nor see her. 



So Alice picked him up very gently, and 
lifted him across more slowly than she had 
lifted the Queen, that she mightn’t take his 
breath away ; but, before she put him on the 
table, she thought she might as well dust him 
a little, he was so covered with ashes. 

She said afterwards that she had never seen 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


^13 


in all her life such a face as the King made, 
when he found himself held in the air by an 
invisible hand, and being dusted ; he was far 
too much astonished to cry out, but his eyes 
and his mouth went on getting larger and 
larger, and rounder and rounder, till her hand 
shook so with laughing that she nearly let him 
drop upon the floor. 

“Oh! please don’t make such faces, my 
dear!” she cried out, quite forgetting that the 
King couldn’t hear her. “You make me laugh 
so that I can hardly hold you! And don’t 
keep your mouth so wide open ! All the ashes 
will get into it — there, now I think you’re tidy 
enough!’’ she added, as she smoothed his hair, 
and set him upon the table near the Queen. 

The King immediately fell flat on his back, 
and lay perfectly still ; and Alice was a little 
alarmed at what she had done, and went round 
the room to see if she could find any water to 
throw over him. However, she could find 
nothing but a bottle of ink, and when she got 
back with it she found he had recovered, and 
he and the Queen were talking together in a 
frightened whisper — so low, that Alice could 
hardly hear what they said. 

The King was saying, “I, assure you, my 
dear, I turned cold to the very ends of my 
whiskers!’’ 

To which the Queen replied, “You haven’t 
got any whiskers. ’ ’ 

“The horror of that moment,’’ the King 
went on, “I shall never, never forget.’’ 


24 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 

“You will, though,” the Queen said, “if you 
don’t make a memorandum of it ’’ 

Alice looked on with great interest as the 
King took an enormous memorandum-book out 
of his pocket, and began writing. A sudden 
thought struck her, and she took hold of the 
end of the pencil, which came some way over 
his shoulder, and began writing for him. 

The poor King looked puzzled and unhappy, 
and struggled with the pencil for some time 
without saying anything; but Alice was too 
strong for him, and at last he panted out, “My 
dear! I really must get a thinner pencil. I 
can’t manage this one a bit; it writes all man- 
ner of things that I don’t intend ’’ 

“What manner of things?’’ said the Queen, 
looking over the book (in which Alice had put 
“The White Knight is sliding down the poker. 
He balances very badly’’). “That’s not a 
memorandum of your feelings. ’ ’ 

There was a book lying near Alice on the 
table, and while she sat watching the White 
King (for she was still a little anxious about 
him, and had the ink all ready to throw over 
him, in case he fainted again), she turned over 
the leaves, to find some part that she could 
read, “ — for it’s all in some language I don’t 
know, ’ ’ she said to herself. 

It was like this; 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


25 




sAJ Xwtj> 

Siid 

,B%vyo^o*to6 llh 

zAhm siwo^w Jjitk 

She puzzled over this for some time, but at 
last a bright thought struck her. “Why, it’s 
a Looking-glass book, of course! And, if I 
hold it up to a glass, the words will all go the 
right way again.” 

This was the poem that Alice read : 


JABBERWOCKY. 

’Twas brillig, and the slithy toves 
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe; 

All mimsy were the borogoves, 

And the mome raths outgrabe. 

“Beware the Jabberwock, my son! 

The jaws that bite, the claws that catch! 
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun 
The frumious Bandersnatch ! ” 

He took his vorpal sword in hand : 

Long time the manxome foe he sought — 
So rested he by the Tumtum tree. 

And stood awhile in thought. 


26 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


And, as in uffish thought he stood, 

The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame. 

Came whifling through the tulgey wood, 

And burbled as it came! 

One, two! One, two! And through and through 
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack ! 

He left it dead, and with its head 
He went galumphing back. 

“And hast thou slain the Jabberwock? 

Come to my arms, my beamish boy! 

O frabjous day! , Callooh! Callay!” 

He chortled in his joy. 

’Twas brillig, and the slithy toves 
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe : 

All mimsy were the borogoves. 

And the mome raths outgrabe. 

“It seems very pretty,” she said when she 
had flnished it, “but it’s rather hard to under- 
stand!” (You see she didn’t like to confess, 
even to herself, that she couldn’t make it out 
at all.) ‘‘Somehow it seems to All my head 
with ideas— only I don’t exactly know what 
they are! However, somebody killed some- 
thing; that’s clear, at any rate — ” 

“But oh!” thought Alice, suddenly jumping 
up, “if I don’t make haste, I shall have to go 
back through the Looking-glass, before I’ve 
seen what the rest of the house is like! Let’s 
have a look at the garden first!” She was out 
o^ the room in a moment, and ran downstairs 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


27 


— or, at least, it wasn’t exactly running, but a 
new invention for getting downstairs quickly 
and easily, as Alice said to herself. She just 
kept the tips of her fingers on the hand-rail, 
and floated gently down without even touching 
the stairs with her feet ; then she floated on 
through the hall, and would have gone straight 
out at the door in the same way, if she hadn’t 
caught hold of the door-post. She was getting 
a little giddy with so much floating in the air, 
and was rather glad to find herself walking 
again in the natural way. 


28 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


CHAPTER IL 

THE GARDEN OF LIVE FLOWERS. 

“I should see the garden far better," said 
Alice to herself, "if I could get to the top of 
that hill; and here’s a path that leads straight 

to it — at least, no, it doesn’t do that ’’ 

(after going a few yards along the path, and 
turning several sharp corners), "but I suppose 
it will at last. But how curiously it twists ! 
It’s more like a corkscrew than a path! Well, 
this turn goes to the hill, I suppose — no, it 
doesn’t! This goes straight back to the house! 
Well, then, I’ll try it the other way." 

And so she did; wandering up and down, 
and trying turn after turn, but always coming 
back to the house, do what she would. In- 
deed, once, when she turned a corner rather 
more quickly than usual, she ran against it 
before she could stop herself. 

"It’s no use talking about it," Alice said, 
looking up at the house and pretending it was 
arguing with her. "I’m not going in again 
yet. I know I should have to get through 
the Looking-glass again — back into the old 
room — and there ’d be an end of all my adven- 
tures!" 

So, resolutely turning her back upon the 
house, she set out once more down the path. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


29 


determined to keep straight on till she got to 
the hill. For a few minutes all went on well, 
and she was just saying “I really shall do it 

this time ” when the path gave a sudden 

twist and shook itself (as she described it after- 
wards), and the next moment she found herself 
actually walking in at the door. 

“Oh, it’s too bad! “she cried. “I never saw 
such a house for getting in the way! Nev- 
er!” 

However, there was the hill full in sight, so 
there was nothing to be done but start again. 
This time she came upon a large flower-bed, 
with a border of daisies, and a willow-tree 
growing in the middle. 

“O Tiger-lily!” said Alice, addressing her- 
self to one that was waving gracefully about 
in the wind, “I wish you could talk!” 

“We can talk,” said the Tiger-lily, “when 
there’s anybody worth talking to.” 

Alice was so astonished that she couldn’t 
speak for a minute : it quite seemed to take 
her breath away. At length, as the Tiger- 
lily only went on waving about, she spoke 
again, in a timid voice — almost in a whisper. 
“And can all the flowers talk?” 

“As well as you can,” said the Tiger-lily. 
“And a great deal louder.” 

“Itisn’t manners for us to begin, you know,” 
said the Rose, “and I really was wondering 
when you’d speak! Said I to myself, ‘Her face 
has got some sense in it, though it’s not a 
clever one!’ Still, you’re the right color, and 
that goes a long way. ” 



“I don’t care about the color,” the Tiger-lily 
remarked. “If only her petals curled up a 
little more, she’d be all right.” 

Alice didn’t like being criticised, so she 
began asking questions. “Aren’t you some- 
times frightened at being planted out here, 
with nobody to take care of you?” 


THROUGH THE LOOfCING-GLASS. 


31 


“There’s the tree in the middle,’’ said the 
Rose. “ What else is it good for?” 

“But what could it do, if any danger came?” 
Alice asked. 

“It could bark,” said the Rose. 

“It says ‘Bough-wough!’ ” cried a Daisy. 
“That’s why its branches are called boughs!” 

“Didn’t you know that?” cried another 
Daisy. And here they all began shouting 
together, till the air seemed quite full of little 
shrill voices. “Silence, every one of you!” 
cried the Tiger- lily, waving itself passionately 
from side to side, and trembling with excite- 
ment. “They know I can’t get at them!” it 
panted, bending its quivering head towards 
Alice, “or they wouldn’t dare to do it!” 

‘ ‘ N ever mind ! ’ ’ Alice said in a soothing tone, 
and, stooping down to the daisies, who were 
just beginning again, she whispered, “If you 
don’t hold your tongues. I’ll pick you!” 

There was silence in a moment, and several 
of the pink daisies turned white. 

“That’s right!” said the Tiger-lily. “The 
daisies are worst of all. When one speaks, 
they all begin together, and it’s enough to 
make one wither to hear the way they go 
on!” 

“How is it you can all talk so nicely?” Alice 
said, hoping to get it into a better temper by 
a compliment. “I’ve been in many gardens 
before, but none of the flowers could talk.” 

“Put your hand down, and feel the ground,” 
said the Tiger-lily. “Then you’ll know 
why. ” 


32 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


Alice did so. “It’s very hard,” she said; 
“but I don’t see what that has to do with 
it.’’ 

“In most gardens,” the Tiger-lily said, “they 
make the beds too soft — so that the flowers are 
always asleep. ’ ’ 

This sounded a very good reason, and Alice 
was quite pleased to know it. “I never thought 
of that before!” she said. 

“It’s my opinion that you never think at 
all,” the Rose said, in a rather severe tone. 

“I never saw anybody that looked stupider,” 
a Violet said, so suddenly, that Alice quite 
jumped; for it hadn’t spoken before. 

“Hold your tongue!” cried the Tiger-lily. 
“As if you ever saw anybody! You keep your 
head under the leaves, and snore away there, 
till you know no more what’s going on in the 
world, than if you were a bud!” 

“Are there any more people in the garden 
besides me?” Alice said, not choosing to notice 
the Rose’s last remark. 

“There’s one other flower in the garden that 
can move about like you,” said the Rose. “I 

wonder how you do it ” (“You’re always 

wondering,” said the Tiger-lily), “but she’s 
more bushy than you are. ’ ’ 

“Is she like me?” Alice asked eagerly, for 
the thought crossed her mind, “There’s an- 
other little girl in the garden, somewhere!” 

“Well, she has the same awkward shape as 
you,” the Rose said: “but she’s redder — and 
her petals are shorter, I think.” 

“They’re done up close, like a dahlia,” said 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


33 


the Tiger-lily: “not tumbled about, like 
yours. ’ ’ 

“But that’s not your fault,” the Rose added 
kindly. “You’re beginning to fade, you know 
— and then one can’t help one’s petals getting 
a little untidy. ’ ’ 

Alice didn’t like this idea at all: so, to 
change the subject, she asked “Does she ever 
come out here?” 

“I daresay you’ll see her soon,” said the 
Rose. “She’s one of the kind that has nine 
spikes, you know.” 

“Where does she wear them?” Alice asked 
with some curiosity. 

“Why, all around her head, of course,” the 
Rose replied. ‘‘I was wondering you hadn’t 
got some too. I thought it was the regular 
rule. ’ ’ 

“She’s coming!” cried the Larkspur. “I 
hear her footstep, thump, thump, along the 
gravel-walk !” 

Alice looked round eagerly and found that it 
was the Red Queen. “She’s grown a good 
deal!” was her first remark. She had indeed: 
when Alice first found her in the ashes, she 
had been only three inches high — and here 
she was, half a head taller than Alice her- 
self! 

“It’s the fresh air that does it,” said the 
Rose; “wonderfully fine air it is, out here.” 

“I think I’ll go and meet her,” said Alice, 
for, though the flowers were interesting 
enough, she felt that it would be far grander 
to have a talk with a real Queen. 

3 Looking Glass 


34 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


“You can’t possibly do that,” said the Rose; 
“I should advise you to walk the other way.” 

This sounded nonsense to Alice, so she said 
nothing, but set off at once towards the Red 
Queen. To her surprise she lost sight of her 
in a moment, and found herself walking in at 
the front-door again. 

A little provoked, she drew back, and, after 
looking everywhere for the Queen (whom she 
spied out at last, a long way off), she thought 
she would try the plan, this time, of walking 
in the opposite direction. 

It succeeded beautifully. She had not been 
walking a minute before she found herself face 
to face with the Red Queen, and full in sight 
of the hill she had been so long aiming at. 

“Where do you come from?” said the Red 
Queen. “And where are you going? Look up, 
speak nicely, and don’t twiddle your fingers 
all the time. ” 

Alice attended to all these directions, and 
explained, as well as she could, that she had 
lost her way. 

“I don’t know what you mean by your way, ” 
said the Queen: “all the ways about here 
. belong to me — but why did you come out here 
at all?” she added in a kinder tone. “Curtsey 
while you’re thinking what to say. It saves 
time.” 

Alice wondered a little at this, but she was 
too much in awe of the Queen to disbelieve it. 
“I’ll try it when I go home,” she thought to 
herself, “the next time I’m a little late for 
dinner. ” 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


35 



“It’s time for 3^ou to answer now,” the 
Queen said, looking at her watch: “open your 
mouth a little wider when you speak, and 
always say ‘your Majesty.’ ” 

“I only wanted to see what the garden was 

like, your Majesty ” 

“That’s right,” said the Queen, patting her 
on the head, which Alice didn’t like at all: 
“though, when you say ‘garden’ — I’ve seen 


36 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


gardens, compared with which this would be 
a wilderness. ” 

Alice didn’t dare to argue the point, but 
went on: “ — and I thought I’d try and find my 
way to the top of that hill ” 

“When you say ‘hill,’ ’’ the Queen inter- 
rupted, “I could show you hills, in comparison 
with which you’d call that a valley. ’’ 

“No, I shouldn’t,” said Alice, surprised into 
contradicting her at last: “a hill can’t be a 
valley, you know. That would be non- 
sense ’’ 

The Red Queen shook her head. “You may 
call it ‘nonsense’ if you like,’’ she said, “but 
I’ve heard nonsense, compared with which 
that would be as sensible as a dictionary!’’ 

Alice curtseyed again, as she was afraid 
from the Queen’s tone that she was a little 
offended: and they walked on in silence till 
they got to the top of the little hill. 

For some minutes Alice stood without speak- 
ing, looking out in all directions over the 
country — and a most curious country it was. 
There were a number of tiny little brooks run- 
ning straight across it from side to side, and 
the ground between was divided up into 
squares by a number of little green hedges, 
that reached from brook to brook. 

“I declare it’s marked out just like a large 
chess-board!’’ Alice said at last. “There 
ought to be some men moving about some- 
where — and so there are!’’ she added in a tone 
of delight, and her heart began to beat quick 
with excitement as she went on. “It’s a great 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


37 


hug’® game of chess that’s being played — all 
over the world — if this is the world at all, you 
know. Oh, what fun it is! How I wish I was 
one of them! I wouldn’t mind being a Pawn, 
if only I might join — though of course I should 
like to be a Queen, best.” 

She glanced rather shyly at the real Queen 
as she said this, but her companion only 
smiled pleasantly, and said ‘‘That’s easily 
managed. You can be the White Queen’s 
Pawn, if you like, as Lily’s too young to play; 
and you’re in the Second Square to begin with: 
when you get to the Eighth Square you’ll be a 

Queen ” Just at this moment, somehow 

or other, they began to run. 

Alice never could quite make out, in think- 
ing it over afterwards how it was that they 
began : all she remembers is, that they were 
running hand in hand, and the Queen went so 
fast that it was all she could do to keep up 
with her: and still the Queen kept crying 
“Faster! Faster!” but Alice felt she could not 
go faster, though she had no breath left to 
say so. 

The most curious part of the thing was, that 
the trees and the other things round them 
never changed their places at all : however fast 
they went, they never seemed to pass any- 
thing. “I wonder if all the things move 
along with us?” thought poor puzzled Alice. 
And the Queen seemed to guess her thoughts, 
for she cried “Faster! Don’t try to talk!” 

Not that Alice had any idea of doing that. 
She felt as if she would never be able to talk 


38 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


again, she was getting so much out of breath: 
and still the Queen cried “Faster! Faster!” 
and dragged her along. “Are we nearly there?” 
Alice managed to pant out at last. 

“Nearly there !” the Queen repeated. “Why, 
we passed it ten minutes ago! Faster!” And 
they ran on for a time in silence, with the wind 
whistling in Alice’s ears, and almost blowing 
her hair off her head, she fancied. 



“NowM Now!” cried the Queen. “Faster! 
Faster!” And they went so fast that at last 
they seemed to skim through the air, hardly 
touching the ground with their feet, till sud- 
denly, just as Alice was getting quite ex- 
hausted, they stopped, and she found herself 
sitting on the ground, breathless and giddy. 

The Queen propped her up against a tree, 
and said kindly, “You may rest a little, now.” 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


39 


Alice looked round her in great surprise. 
“Why, I do believe we’ve been under this 
tree the whole time! Everything’s just as it 
was ! ’ ’ 

“Of course it is, ’’ said the Queen. “What 
would you have it?’’ 

“Well, in our country,’’ said Alice, still 
panting a little, “you’d generally get to some- 
where else — if you ran very fast for a long time 
as we’ve been doing.’’ 

“A slow sort of country!’’ said the Queen. 
“Now, here, you see, it takes all the running 
you can do, to keep in the same place. If you 
want to get somewhere else, you must run at 
least twice as fast as that!’’ 

“I’d rather not try, please!’’ said Alice. 
“I’m quite content to stay here — only I am so 
hot and thirsty!’’ 

“I know what you’d like!’’ the Queen said 
good-naturedly, taking a little box out of her 
pocket. “Have a biscuit?’’ 

Alice thought it would not be civil to say 
“No,’’ though it wasn’t at all what she wanted. 
So she took it, and ate it as well as she could : 
and it was very dry: and she thought she had 
never been so nearly choked in all her life. 

“While you’re refreshing yourself,’’ said the 
Queen, “I’ll just take the measurements.’’ 
And she took a ribbon out of her pocket, 
marked in inches, and began measuring the 
ground, and sticking little pegs in here and 
there. 

“At the end of two yards,’’ she said, putting 


40 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 

in a peg to mark the distance, ‘ ‘ I shall give 
you your directions — have another biscuit?” 

‘‘No, thank you,” said Alice; “one’s quite 
enough ! ’ ’ 

“Thirst quenched, I hope?” said the Queen. 

Alice did not know what to say to this, but 
luckily the Queen did not wait for an answer, 
but went on. “At the end of three yards I 
shall repeat them — for fear of your forgetting 

them. At the end of four, I shall say good- 
bye. And at the end of five, I shall go!” 

She had got all the pegs put in by this time, 
and Alice looked on with great interest as she 
returned to the tree, and then began slowly 
walking down the row. 

At the two- yard peg she faced round, and 
said, “A pawn goes two squares in its first 
move, you know. So you’ll go very quickly 
through the Third Square — by railway, I 
should think, and you’ll find yourself in the 
Fourth Square in no time. Well, that square 
belongs to Tweedledum and Tweedledee — the 
Fifth is mostly water — the Sixth belongs to 
Humpty Dumpty — But you make no re- 
mark?” 

“I — I didn’t know I had to make one — just 

then, ’ ’ Alice faltered out. 

“You should have said,” the Queen went on 
in a tone of grave reproof, “ ‘It’s extremely 
kind of you to tell me all this’ — however, we’ll 
suppose it said — the Seventh Square is all for- 
est — however, one of the Knights will show 
you the way — and in the Eighth Square we 
shall be Queens together, and it’s all feasting 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 41 

and fun!” Alice got up and curtseyed, and 
sat down again. 

At the next peg the Queen turned again, and 
this time she said, “Speak in French when 
you can’t think of the English for a thing — 
*urn out your toes as you walk — and remember 
who you are ! ’ ’ She did not wait for Alice to 
curtsey this time, but walked on quickly to 
the next peg, where she turned for a moment 
to say “Good-bye,” and then hurried on to the 
last. 

How it happened, Alice never knew, but 
exactly as she came to the last peg, she was 
gone. Whether she vanished into the air, or 
whether she ran quickly into the wood (“and 
she can run very fast!” thought Alice), there 
was no way of guessing, but she was gone, and 
Alice began to remember that she was a 
Pawn, and that it would soon be time for her 
to move. 


42 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


CHAPTER III. 

LOOKING-GLASS INSECTS. 

Of course, the first thing to do was to make 
a grand survey of the country she was going 
to travel through. “It’s something very like 
learning geography,’’ thought Alice, as she 
stood on tiptoe in hopes of being able to see a 
little further. “Principal rivers — there are 
none. Principal mountains — I’m on the only 
one, but I don’t think it’s got any name. 
Principal towns — why, what are those crea- 
tures, making honey down there? They can’t 
be bees — nobody ever saw bees a mile off, you 

know ’’ and for some time she stood silent, 

watching one of them that was bustling about; 
among the flowers, poking its proboscis into 
them, “just as if it was a regular bee,’’ thought 
Alice. 

However, this was anything but a regular 
bee: in fact, it was an elephant — as Alice soon 
found out, though the idea quite took her breath 
away at first. “And what enormous flowers 
they must be !’’ was her next ideal. “Some- 
thing like cottages with the roofs taken off, 
and stalks put to them — and what quantities 
of honey they must make! I think I’ll go 
do\Vn and — no, I won’t go just yet,’’ she went 
on, checking herself just as she was beginning 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


43 


to run down the hill, and trying to find some 
excuse for turning shy so suddenly. “It’ll 
never do to go down among them without a 
good long branch to brush them away — and 
what fun it’ll be when they ask me how I 
liked my walk. I shall say, ‘Oh, I liked it 

well enough ’ (here came the favorite little 

toss of the head), ‘only, it was so dusty and 
hot, and the elephants did tease so!’ 

“I think I’ll go down the other way,” she 
said after a pause; “and perhaps I may visit 
the elephants later on. Besides, I do so want 
to get into the Third Square!” 

So, with this excuse, she ran down the hill, 
and jumped over the first of the six little 
brooks. 

4: Hi * 

Hi , ❖ Hi Hi 

Hi Hi H< H« Hi 

“Tickets, please!” said the Guard, putting 
his head in at the window. In a moment 
everybody was holding out a ticket ; they were 
about the same size as the people, and quite 
seemed to fill the carriage. 

“Now, then! Show your ticket, child!” the 
Guard went on, looking angrily at Alice. And 
a great many voices all said together (“like 
the chorus of a song,” thought Alice), “Don’t 
keep him waiting, child! Why, his time is 
worth a thousand pounds a minute!” 

“I’m afraid I haven’t got one,” Alice said in 
a frightened tone ; “there wasn’t a ticket office 


44 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 

where I came from. ” A.ncl again the chorus 
of voices went on. “There wasn’t room for 
one where she came from. The land there is 
worth a thousand pounds an inch!’' 

“Don’t make excuses,’’ said the Guard; 
“you should have bought one from the engine 
driver.” And once more the chorus of voices 
went on with “The man that drives the en- 
gine. Why, the smoke alone is worth a thou- 
sand pounds a puff!” 

Alice thought to herself, “Then there’s no 
use in speaking.” The voices didn’t join in, 
this time, as she hadn’t spoken, but, to her 
great surprise, they all thought in chorus (I 
hope you understand what thinking in chorus 
means — for I must confess that I don’t), “Bet- 
ter say nothing at all. Language is worth a 
thousand pounds a word ! ’ ’ 

‘ ‘ I shall dream about a thousand pounds to- 
night, I know I shall!” thought Alice. 

All this time the Guard was looking at her, 
first through a telescope, then through a micro- 
scope, and then through an opera-glass. At 
last he said, “You’re traveling the wrong 
way,” and shut up the window, and went 
away. 

“So young a child,” said the gentleman 
sitting opposite her (he was dressed in white 
paper), “ought to know which way she’s go- 
ing, even if she doesn’t know her own 
name!” 

A Goat, that was sitting next to the gentle- 
man in white, shut his eyes and said in a loud 
voice, “She ought to know her way to the 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


45 


ticket office, even if she doesn’t know her 
alphabet!” 

There was a beetle sitting next the Goat (it 
was a very queer carriage-full of passengers 
altogether), and as the rule seemed to be that 
they should all speak in turn, he went on with, 
“ She’ll have to go back from here as luggage. ” 

Alice couldn’t see who was sitting beyond 
the Beetle, but a hoarse voice spoke next. 

“Change engines — ” it said, "and there it 
choked and was obliged to leave off. 

“It sounds like a horse,” Alice thought 
to herself. And an extremely small voice, close 

to her ear, said, “You might make a joke on that— some- 
thing about ‘horse’ and ‘hoarse,’ you know.’’ 

Then a very gentle voice in the distance 
said, “She must be labeled, ‘Lass, with care,’ 
you know — ” 

And after that other voices went on (“What 
a number of people there are in the carriage 1 ’ ’ 
thought Alice), saying, “She must go by post, 

as she’s got a head on her ” “She must 

be sent as a message by the telegraph ” 

“She must draw the train herself the rest of 
the way , ’ ’ and so on. 

But the gentleman dressed in white paper 
leaned forward and whispered in her ear, 
“Never mind what they all say, my dear, but 
take a return ticket every time the train 
stops. ’ ’ 

“Indeed, I sha’n’t!” Alice said rather im- 
patiently. “I don’t belong to this railway 
journey at all — I was in a wood just now — and 
I wish I could get back there!” 


46 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


“You might make a joke on that,” Said the little VOice 
close to her ear “something about ‘you would if you 
could,’ you know.” 

“Don’t tease so,” said Alice, looking about 
in vain to see where the voice came from. “If 
you’re so anxious to have a joke made, why 
don’t you make one 5^ourself?” 

The little voice sighed deeply. It was very 
unhappy, evidently, and Alice would have said 
something pitying to comfort it, “if it would 
only sigh like other people!” she thought. 
But this was such a wonderfully small sigh, 
that she wouldn’t have heard it at all, if it 
hadn’t come quite close to her ear. The con- 
sequence of this was that it tickled her ear 
very much, and quite took off her thoughts 
from the unhappiness of the poor little crea- 
ture. 

“I know you are a friend,” the little VOice Went On ; 
“a dear friend, and an old friend. And you won’t hurt me, 
though I am an insect.” 

“What kind of insect?” Alice inquired, a lit- 
tle' anxiously. What she really wanted to know 
was, whether it could sting or not, but she 
thought this wouldn’t be quite a civil question 
to ask. 

“What, then you don’t — ” the little voice began, 
when it was drowned by a shrill scream from 
the engine, and everybody jumped up in alarm, 
Alice among the rest. 

The Horse, who had put his head out of the 
window, quietly drew it in and said, “It’s only 
a brook we have to jump over. ” Everybody 
seemed satisfied with this, though Alice felt a 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


47 


little nervous at the idea of trains jumping at 
all. “However, it’ll take us into the Fourth 
Square, that’s some comfort!” she said to her- 
self. In another moment she felt the carriage 
rise straight up into the air, and in her fright 
she caught at the thing nearest to her hand, 
which happened to be the Goat’s beard. 

❖ * * * * 

* ❖ 

!is ^ Hs 

But the beard seemed to melt away as she 
touched it, and she found herself sitting quietly 
under a tree — while the Gnat (for that was the 
insect she had been talking to) was balancing 
itself on a twig just over her head, and fanning 
her with its wings. 

It certainly was a very large Gnat ; “about 
the size of a chicken,” Alice thought. Still, 
she couldn’t feel nervous with it, after they 
had been talking together so long. 

“ — then you don’t like all insects?” the Gnat 
w^ent on, as quietly as if nothing had hap- 
pened. 

“I like them when they can talk,” Alice 
said. “None of them ever talk, where I come 
from. ” 

“What sort of insects do you rejoice in, 
where you come from?” the Gnat inquired. 

“I don’t rejoice in insects at all,” Alice ex- 
plained, “because I’m rather afraid of them — 
at least the large kinds. But I can tell you the 
names of some of them.” 


48 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


“Of course, they answer to their names,” 
the Gnat remarked carelessly. 

“I never knew them do it.” 

“What’s the use of their having names,” the 
Gnat said, “if they won’t answer to them?” 

“No use to them,” said Alice; “but it’s use- 
ful to the people that name them, I suppose. 
If not, why do things have names at all?” 



“I can’t say,” the Gnat replied. “Further 
on, in the wood down there, they’ve got no 
names — however, go on with your list of in- 
sects; you’re wasting time.” 

“Well, there’s the Horse-fly,” Alice began, 
counting off the names on her fingers. 

“All right,” said the Gnat. “Half-way up 
that bush, you’ll see a Rocking-horse-fly, if 
you look. It’s made entirely of wood, and 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


49 


gets about by swinging itself from branch to 
branch.” 

“What does it live on?” Alice asked, with 
great curiosity. 

“Sap and sawdust,” said the Gnat. “Go on 
with the list. ’ ’ 

Alice looked at the Rocking-horse-fly with 
great interest, and made up her mind that it 
must have been just repainted, it looked so 
bright and sticky ; and then she went on. 

“And there’s the Dragon-fly.” 

“Look on the branch above your head,” said 
the Gnat, “and there you’ll find a Snap-dragon- 
fly. Its body is made of plum-pudding, its 
wings of holly-leaves, and its head is a raisin 
burning in brandy. ’ ’ 

“And what does it live on?” Alice asked, as 
before. 

“Frumenty and mince-pie, ” the Gnat replied, 
“and it makes its nest in a Christmas-box.” 

“And then there’s the Butterfly,” Alice 
went on, after she had taken a good look at the 
insect with its head on fire, and had thought to 
herself, “I wonder if that’s the reason insects 
are so fond of flying into candles — because they 
want to turn into Snap-dragon-flies!” 

“Crawling at your feet,” said the Gnat 
(Alice drew her feet back in some alarm), 
“you may observe a Bread-and-butter-fly. Its 
wings are thin slices of bread-and-butter, its 
body is a crust, and its head is a lump of 
sugar. ” 

“And what does it live on?” 

“Weak tea with cream in it.” 

4 Looking Glass 


50 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


A new difficulty came into Alice’s head. 
“Supposing it couldn’t find any?” she sug- 
gested. 

“Then it would die, of course.” 

“But that must happen very often,” Alice 
remarked thoughtfully. 

“It always happens,” said the Gnat. 

After this, Alice was silent for a minute or 
two, pondering. The Gnat amused itself 
meanwhile by humming round and round her 
head: at last it settled again and remarked “I 
suppose you don’t want to lose your name?” 

“No, indeed,” Alice said, a little anxious- 

ly- 

“And yet I don’t know,” the Gnat went on 
in a careless tone : “only think how convenient 
it would be if you could manage to go home 
without it! For instance, if the governess 
wanted to call you to your lessons, she would 

call out ‘Come here , ’ and there she would 

have to leave off, because there wouldn’t be 
any name for her to call, and of course you 
wouldn’t have to go, you know.” 

“That would never do, I’m sure,” said 
Alice: “the governess would never think of 
excusing my lessons for that. If she couldn’t 
remember my name, she’d call me ‘Miss,’ as 
the servants do. ’ ’ 

“Well, if she said ‘Miss,’ and didn’t say any- 
thing more,” the Gnat remarked, “of course 
you’d miss your lessons. That’s a joke. I 
wish you had made it.” 

“Why do you wish I had made it?” Alice 
asked. “It’s a very bad one. ” 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


51 


But the Gnat only sighed deeply, while twa 
large tears came rolling down its cheeks. 

“You shouldn’t make jokes,” Alice said, “if 
it makes you so unhappy. ’ ’ 

Then came another of those melancholy little 
sighs, and this time the poor Gnat really seemed 
to have sighed itself away, for, when Alice 
looked up, there was nothing whatever to be 
seen on the twig, and, as she was getting quite 
chilly with sitting still so long, she got up and 
walked on. 

She very soon came to an open field, with a 
wood on the other side of it ; it looked much 
darker than the last wood, and Alice felt a 
little timid about going into it. However, on 
second thoughts, she made up her mind to go 
on. “for I certainly won’t go back,” she 
thought to herself, and this was the only way 
to the Eighth Square. 

“This must be the wood,” she said thought- 
fully to herself, “where things have no names. 
I wonder what’ll become of my name when I 
go in? I shouldn’t like to lose it at all — 
because they’d have to give me another, and it 
would be almost certain to be an ugly one. 
But then the fun would be, trying to find the 
creature that had got my old name! That’s 
just like the advertisements, you know, when 
people lose dogs — ‘answers to the name of 
“Dash had on a brass collar’ — just fancy call- 
ing everything you met ‘Alice,’ till one of 
them answered! Only they wouldn’t answer 
at all, if they were wise.” 

She was rambling on in this way when she 


52 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 

reached the wood: it looked very cool and 
shady. “Well, at any rate it’s a great com- 
fort,” she said as she stepped under the trees, 
“after being so hot, to get into the — into the 
— into what?” she went on, rather surprised at 
not being able to think of the word. ‘ ‘ I mean 
to get under the — under the — under this, you 
know!” putting her hand on the trunk of the 
tree. “What does it call itself, I wonder? I 
do believe it’s got no name — why, to be sure it 
hasn’t!” 

She stood silent for a minute, thinking: then 
she suddenly began again. “Then it really 
has happened, after all! And now, who am I? 
I will remember, if I can! I’m determined 
to do it!” But iDeing determined didn’t help 
her much, and all she could say, after a great 
deal of puzzling, was “L, I know it begins 
with L!” 

Just then a Fawn came wandering by: it 
looked at Alice with its large gentle eyes, but 
didn’t seem at all frightened. “Here then! 
Here then!” Alice said, as she held out her 
hand and tried to stroke it ; but it only started 
back a little, and then stood looking at her 
again. 

“What do you call yourself?” the Fawn said 
at last. Such a soft sweet voice it had ! 

“I wish I knew!” thought poor Alice. She 
answered, rather sadly, “Nothing, just 
now. ’ ' 

“Think again,” it said: “that won’t do.” 

Alice thought, but nothing came of it. 
“Please, would you tell me what you call your- 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


53 



self?” she said timidly. ‘‘I think that might 
help a little. ’ ’ 

“ITl tell you, if you’ll come a little further 
on,” the Fawn said. can’t remember 

here.” 

So they walked on together through the 
wood, Alice with her arms clasped lovingly 
round the soft neck of the Fawn, till they came 
out into another open field, and here the Fawn 
gave a sudden bound into the air, and shook 
itself free from Alice’s arm. ‘‘I’m a Fawn!” 
it cried out in a voice of delight. ‘‘And, dear 


54 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 

me! you’re a human child!” A sudden look 
of alarm came into its beautiful brown eyes, 
and in another moment it had darted away at 
full speed. 

Alice stood looking after it, almost ready to 
cry with vexation at having lost her dear little 
fellow-traveler so suddenly. “However, I 
know my name now,” she said: “that’s some 
comfort. Alice — Alice — I won’t forget it 
again. And now, which of these finger-posts 
ought I to follow, I wonder?” 

It was not a very difficult question to answer, 
as there was only one road through the wood, 
and the two finger-posts both pointed along 
it. “I’ll settle it,” Alice said to herself, 
“when the road divides and they point differ- 
ent ways. ’ ’ 

But this did not seem likely to happen. She 
went on and on, a long way, but, wherever the 
road divided, there were sure to be two finger- 
posts pointing the same way, one marked ‘To 
Tweedledum’s House,’ and the other ‘To the 
House of Tweedledee. ’ 

“I do believe,” said Alice at last, “that they 
live in the same house! I wonder I never 
thought of that before — But I can’t stay there 
long. I’ll just call and say ‘How d’ye do?’ 
and ask them the way out of the wood. If I 
could only get to the Eighth Square before it 
gets dark!” So she wandered on, talking to 
herself as she went, till, on turning a sharp 
corner, she came upon fwo fat little men, so 
suddenly that she could not help starting back, 
but in another moment she recovered herself, 
feeling sure that they must be. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


55 


CHAPTER IV. 

TWEEDLEDUM AND TWEEDLEDEE. 

They were standing under a tree, each with 
an arm round the other’s neck, and Alice knew 
which was which in a moment, because one of 
them had ‘DUM’ embroidered on his collar, 



and the other ‘DEE.’ ‘T suppose they’ve 
each got ‘TWEEDLE’ round at the back of 
the collar, ’ ’ she said to herself. 

They stood so still that she quite forgot they 


56 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


were alive, and she was just going round to 
see if the word ‘TWEEDLE’ was written at 
the back of each collar, when she was startled 
by a voice coming from the one marked 
‘DUM.’ 

“If you think we’re wax- works, ” he said, 
“you ought to pay, you know. Wax- works 
weren’t made to be looked at for nothing. 
Nohow!” 

“Contrariwise,” added the one marked 
‘DEE,’ “if you think we’re alive, you ought 
to speak. ’ ’ 

“I’m sure I’m very sorry,” was all Alice 
could say ; for the words of the old song kept 
ringing through her head like the ticking of a 
clock, and she could hardly help saying them 
out loud : — 

“Tweedledum and Tweedledee 
Agreed to have a battle ; 

For Tweedledum said Tweedledee 
Had spoiled his nice new rattle. 

Just then flew down a monstrous crow, 

As black as a tar-barrel ; 

Which frightened both the heroes so, 

They quite forgot their quarrel. ’ ’ 

“I know what you’re thinking about,” said 
Tweedledum; “but it isn’t so, nohow.” 

“Contrariwise,” continued Tweedledee, “if 
it was so, it might be; and if it were so, it 
would be; but as it isn’t, it ain’t. That’s 
logic. ’ ’ 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


57 


“I was thinking,” Alice said very politely, 
“which is the best way out of this wood: it’s 
getting so dark. Would you tell me, please?” 

But the fat little men only looked at each 
other and grinned. 

They looked so exactly like a couple of great 
schoolboys, that Alice couldn’t help pointing 
her finger at Tweedledum, and saying “First 
Boy!” 

“Nohow!” Tweedledum cried out briskly, 
and shut his mouth up again with a snap, 

“Next Boy!” said Alice, passing on to 
Tweedledee, though she felt quite certain he 
would only shout out ‘ ‘Contrariwise ! ’ ’ and so 
he did. 

“You’ve begun wrong!” cried Tweedledum. 
“The first thing in a visit is to say ‘How 
d’ye do?’ and shake hands!” And here the 
two brothers gave each other a hug, and then 
they held out the two hands that were free, to 
shake hands with her. 

Alice did not like shaking hands with either 
of them first, for fear of hurting the other 
one’s feelings; so, as the best way out of the 
difficulty, she took hold of both hands at once : 
the next moment they were dancing round in 
a ring. This seemed quite natural (she 
remembered afterwards), and she was not 
even surprised to hear music playing: it 
seemed to come from the tree under which they 
were dancing, and it was done (as well as she 
could make it out) by the branches rubbing 
one across the other, like fiddles and fiddle- 
sticks. 


58 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


“But it certainly was funny,” (Alice said 
afterwards, when she was telling her sister the 
history of all this,) “to find myself singing 
‘Here we go round the mulberry bush. ’ I 
don’t know when I began it, but somehow I 
felt as if Td been singing it a long time!” 

The other two dancers were fat, and very 
soon out of breath. “Four times round is 
enough for one dance,” Tweedledum panted 
out, and they left off dancing as suddenly as 
they had begun : the music stopped at the same 
moment. 

Then they let go of Alice’s hands, and stood 
looking at her for a minute : there was a rather 
awkward pause, as Alice didn’t know how to 
begin a conversation with people she had just 
been dancing with. “It would never do to say 
‘How d’ye do?’ now,” she said to herself: “we 
seem to have got beyond that, somehow. ” 

“I hope you’re not much tired?” she said at 
last. 

“Nohow. And thank you very much for 
asking, ’ ’ said Tweedledum. 

“So much obliged!” added Tweedledee. 
“You like poetry?” 

“Ye-es, pretty well — some poetry,” Alice 
said doubtfully. “Would you tell me which 
road leads out of the wood?” 

“What shall I repeat to her?” said Tweed- 
ledee, looking round at Tweedledum with great 
solemn eyes, and not noticing Alice’s question. 

“ ‘The Walrus and the Carpenter’ is the 
longest,” Tweedledum replied, giving his 
brother an affectionate hug. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


59 


Tweedledee began instantly: 

The sun was shining ” 

Here Alice ventured to interrupt him. “If 
it’s very long,” she said, as politely as she 
could, “would you please tell me first which 
road ” 

Tweedledee smiled gently, and began again : 


“The sun was shining on the sea. 
Shining with all his might: 

He did his very best to make 
The billows smooth and bright — 
And this was odd, because it was 
The middle of the night 


The moon was shining sulkily. 
Because she thought the sun 
Had got no business to be there 
After the day was done — 

‘It’s very rude of him,’ she said, 
‘To come and spoil the fun!’ 


The sea was wet as wet could be. 
The sands were dry as dry. 

You could not see a cloud, because 
No cloud was in the sky: 

No birds were flying overhead — 
There were no birds to fly. 


60 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 



The Walrus and the carpenter 
Were walking close at hand: 
They wept like anything to see 
Such quantities of sand : 

' Hf this were only cleared away, 

They said, ‘it would be grand!’ 

I 

! 

! ‘If seven maids with seven mops 

! Swept it for half a year, 

Do you suppose, ’ the Walrus said, 
‘That they could get it clear?’ 

‘I doubt it,’ said the Carpenter, 
And shed a bitter tear. 


‘O Oysters, come and walk with us!’ 

The Walrus did beseech. 

‘A pleasant walk, a pleasant talk, 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


61 


Along the briny beach: 

We cannot do with more than four, 
To give a hand to each. ’ 


The eldest Oyster looked at him, 
But never a word he said : 

The eldest Oyster winked his eye. 
And shook his heavy head — 
Meaning to say he did not choose 
To leave the Oyster-bed. 


But four young Oysters hurried up. 

All eager for the treat : 

Their coats were brushed, their faces 
washed. 

Their shoes were clean and neat — 
And this was odd, because, you know. 
They hadn’t any feet. 

Four other Oysters followed them, 

And yet another four ; 

And thick and fast they came at last, 
And more, and more, and more — 

All hopping through the frothy waves. 
And scrambling to the shore. 

The Walrus and the Carpenter 
Walked on a mile or so, 

And then they rested on a rock 
Conveniently low: 

And all the little Oysters stood 
And waited in a row. 


62 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


‘The time has come,’ the Walrus said, 
‘To talk of many things: 

Of shoes — and ships — and sealing-wax — 
Of cabbages— and kings — 

And why the sea is boiling hot — 

And whether pigs have wings. ’ 



‘But wait a bit,’ the Oysters cried, 
‘Before we have our chat; 

For some of us are out of breath, 
And all of us are fat!’ 

‘No hurry!’ said the Carpenter. 
They thanked him much for that. 

‘A loaf of bread,’ the Walrus said, 
‘Is what we chiefly need: 

Pepper and vinegar besides 
Are very good indeed — 

Now, if you’re ready, Oysters dear, 
We can begin to feed.’ 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


63 


‘But not on us!’ the Oysters cried, 
Turning a little blue. 

‘After such kindness, that would be 
A dismal thing to do!’ 

‘The night is fine,’ the Walrus said. 
‘Do you admire the view? 



‘It was so kind of. you to come! 

And you are very nice!’ 

The Carpenter said nothing but 
‘Cut us another slice. 

I wish you were not quite so deaf — 
I’ve had to ask you twice!’ 


‘It seems a shame,’ the Walrus said, 
‘To play them such a trick. 

After we’ve brought them out so far, 
And made them trot so quick!’ 

The Carpenter said nothing but 
The butter’s spread too thick!’ 


64 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 

‘I weep for you,’ the Walrus said: 

T deeply sympathize.’ 

With sobs and tears he sorted out 
Those of the largest size, 

Holding his pocket-handkerchief 
Before his streaming eyes. 

‘O Oysters, ’ said the Carpenter, 

‘You’ve had a pleasant run! 

Shall we be trotting home again?’ 

But answer came there none — 

And this was scarcely odd, because 
They’d eaten every one.” 

“I like the Walrus best,” said Alice: “be- 
cause he was a little sorry for the poor oysters. ” 

“He ate more than the Carpenter, though,” 
said Tweedledee. “You see he held his hand- 
kerchief in front, so that the Carpenter couldn’t 
count how many he took : contrariwise. ’ ’ 

“That was mean!” Alice said indignantly. 
“Then I like the Carpenter best— if he didn’t 
eat so many as the Walrus.” 

“But he ate as many as he could get,” said 
Tweedledum. 

This was a puzzler. After a pause, Alice 
began, “Well! They were both very unpleas- 
ant characters ” Here she checked herself 

in some alarm, at hearing something that 
sounded to her like the puffing of a large 
steam-engine in the wood near them, though 
she feared it was more likely to be a wild 
beast. “Are there any lions or tigers about 
here?” she asked timidly. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


65 


“It’s only the Red King snoring,” said 
Tweedledee. 

“Come and look at him!” the brothers cried, 
and they each took one of Alice’s hands, and 
led her up to where the King was sleeping. 

“Isn’t he a lovely sight?” said Tweedledum. 

Alice couldn’t say honestly that he was. 
He had a tall red night-cap on, with a tassel, 
and he was lying crumpled up into a sort of 

untidy heap, and snoring loud “fit to snore 

his head off!” as Tweedledum remarked. 

“I’m afraid he’ll catch cold with lying on 
the damp grass, ’ ’ said Alice, who was a very 
thoughtful little girl. 

“He’s dreaming now,” said Tweedledee: 
“and what do you think he’s dreaming about?” 

Alice said, “Nobody can guess that.” 

“Why, about you!” Tweedledee exclaimed, 
clapping his hands triumphantly. “And if he 
left off dreaming about you, where do you 
suppose you’d be?” 

“Where I am now, of course, ” said Alice. 

“Not you!” Tweedledee retorted contemptu- 
ously. “You’d be nowhere. Why, you re 
only a sort of thing in his dream ! ’ ’ 

“If that there King was to wake, ” added 
Tweedledum, “you’d go out — bang! — just like 
a candle ! ’ ’ 

“I shouldn’t!” Alice exclaimed indignantly. 
“Besides, if I’m only a sort of thing in his 
dream, what are you, I should like to know?” 

“Ditto,” said Tweedledum. 

“Ditto, ditto!” cried Tweedledee. 

He shouted this so loud that Alice couldn’t 

5 Looking Glass 


66 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


help saying “Hush! You’ll be waking him, 
I’m afraid, if you make so much noise.’’ 

“Well, it’s no use your talking about waking 
him,’’ said Tweedledum, “when you’re only 
one of the things in his dream. You know 
very well you’re not real. ’’ 

“I am real!” said Alice, and began to cry. 

“You won’t make yourself a bit reader by 
crying,’’ Tweedledee remarked: “there’s 
nothing to cry about.’’ 

“If I wasn’t real,’’ Alice said — half-laugh- 
ing through her tears, it all seemed so ridicu- 
lous — “I shouldn’t be able to cry.’’ 

“I hope you don’t suppose those are real 
tears?’’ Tweedledum interrupted in a tone of 
great contempt. 

“I know they’re talking nonsense,’’ Alice 
thought to herself: “and it’s foolish to cry 
about it. ’ ’ So she brushed away her tears, and 
went on, as cheerfully as she could, “At any 
rate I’d better be getting out of the wood, for 
really it’s coming on very dark. Do you think 
it’s going to rain?’’ 

Tweedledum spread a large umbrella over 
himself and his brother, and looked up into it. 
“No, I don’t think it is,’’ he said: “at least — 
not under here. Nohow.’’ 

“But it may rain outside?’’ 

“It may — if it chooses,’’ said Tweedledee: 
“we’ve no objection. Contrariwise.’’ 

“Selfish things!’’ thought Alice, and she was 
just going to say “Good-night’ ’and leave them, 
when Tweedledum sprang out from under the 
umbrella, and seized her by the wrist. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


67 


“Do you see that?” he said, in a voice chok- 
ing with passion, and his eyes grew large and 
yellow all in a moment, as he pointed with a 
trembling finger at a small white thing lying 
under the tree. 

“It’s only a rattle,’’ Alice said, after a care- 
ful examination of the little white thing. “Not 
a rattle-snake, you know,’’ she added hastily, 
thinking that he was frightened: “only an old 
rattle — quite old and broken.’’ 



“I knew it was!’’ cried Tweedledum, begin- 
ning to stamp about wildly and tear his hair. 
“It’s spoilt, of course!’’ Here he looked at 
Tweedledee, who immediately sat down on 
the ground, and tried to hide himself under 
the umbrella. 

Alice laid her hand upon his arm, and said, 


68 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


in a soothing tone, “You needn’t be so angry 
about an old rattle.’’ 

“But it isn’t old!’’ Tweedledum cried, in a 
greater fury than ever. “It’s new, I tell you 
— I bought it yesterday — my nice new rattle!” 
and his voice rose to a perfect scream. 

All this time Tweedledee was trying his best 
to fold up the umbrella, with himself in it: 
which was such an extraordinary thing to do, 
that it quite took off Alice’s attention from 
the angry brother. But he couldn’t quite suc- 
ceed, and it ended in his rolling over, bundled 
up in the umbrella, with only his head out: 
and there he lay, opening and shutting his 

mouth and his large eyes “looking more 

like a fish than anything else,” Alice thought. 

“Of course you agree to have a battle?” 
Tweedledum said in a calmer tone. 

“I suppose so,” the other sulkily replied, as 
he crawled out of the umbrella: “only she 
must help us to dress up, you know. ” 

So the two brothers went off hand-in-hand 
into the wood, and returned in a minute with 
their arms full of things — such as bolsters, 
blankets, hearth-rugs, table-cloths, dish-covers 
and coal-scuttles. “I hope you’re a good 
hand at pinning and tying strings?” Tweedle- 
dum remarked. “Every one of these things 
has got to go on, somehow or other.” 

Alice said afterwards she had never seen 
such a fuss made about anything in all her life 
— the way those two bustled about — and the 
quantity of things they put on — and the trouble 
they gave her in tying strings and fastening 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


69 


buttons “Really they’ll be more like bun- 

dles of old clothes than anything else, by the 
time they’re ready !’’ she said to herself, as she 
arranged a bolster round the neck of Tweedle- 
dee, “to keep his head from being cut off,’’ as 
he said. 

“You know,’’ he added very gravely, “it’s 
one of the most serious things that can pos- 
sibly happen to one in a battle — to get one’s 
head cut off. ’ ’ 



Alice laughed loud : but she managed to turn 
it into a cough, for fear of hurting his feelings. 

“Do I look very pale?’’ said Tweedledum, 
coming up to have his helmet tied on. (He 
called it a helmet, though it certainly looked 
much more like a saucepan.) 

“Well — yes — a little,’’ Alice replied gently. 


70 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


“I’m very brave, generally,” he went on 
in a low voice: “only to-day I happen to have 
a headache. ” 

“And I’ve got a toothache!’’ said Tweedle- 
dee, who had overheard the remark. “I’m 
far worse than you!” 

“Then you’d better not fight to-day,” said 
Alice, thinking it a good opportunity to make 
peace. 

“We must have a bit of a fight, but I don’t 
care about going on long, ’ ’ said Tweedledum. 
“What’s the time now?” 

Tweedledee looked at his watch, and said, 
“Half-past four. ” 

“Let’s fight till six, and then have dinner,” 
said Tweedledum. 

“Very well,” the other said, rather sadly: 
“and she can watch us — only you’d better not 
come very close,” he added: “I generall)^ hit 
everything I can see — when I get really ex- 
cited. ” 

“And I hit everything within reach,” cried 
Tweedledum, “whether I can see it or not!” 

Alice laughed. “You must hit the trees 
pretty often, I should think,” she said 

Tweedledum looked round him with a satis- 
fied smile. “I don’t suppose,” he said, 
“there’ll be a tree left standing, for ever so far 
round, by the time we’ve finished!” 

“And all about a rattle!” said Alice, still 
hoping to make them a little ashamed of fight- 
ing for such a trifle. 

“I shouldn’t have minded it so much,” said 
Tweedledum, “if it hadn’t been a new one.” 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


71 


“I wish the monstrous crow would come!” 
thought Alice. 

‘‘There’s only one sword, you know,” 
Tweedledum said to his brother: “but you 
can have the umbrella — it’s quite as sharp. 
Only we must begin quick. It’s getting as 
dark as it can. ” 

“And darker,” said Tweedledee. 

It was getting dark so suddenly that Alice 
thought there must be a thunderstorm coming 
on. “What a thick black cloud that is!” she 
said. “And how fast it comes! Why, I do 
believe it’s got wings!” 

“It’s the crow!” Tweedledum cried out in 
a shrill voice of alarm ; and the two brothers 
took to their heels and were out of sight in a 
moment. 

Alice ran a little way into the wood, and 
stopped under a large tree. “It can never get 
at me here,” she thought: “it’s far too large 
to squeeze itself in among the trees. But I 
wish it wouldn’t flap its wings so — it makes 
quite a hurricane in the wood — here’s some- 
body’s shawl being blown away!” 


72 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


CHAPTER V. 

WOOL AND WATER. 

She caught the shawl as she spoke, and 
looked about for the owner: in another mo- 
ment the White Queen came running wildly 
through the wood, with both arms stretched 
out wide, as if she were flying, and Alice very 
civilly went to meet her with the shawl. 

“I’m very glad I happened to be in the 
way,” Alice said, as she helped her to put on 
her shawl again. 

The White Queen only looked at her in a 
helpless frightened sort of way, and kept re- 
peating something in a whisper to herself that 
sounded like “Bread-and-butter, bread-and- 
butter, ’ ’ and Alice felt that if there was to be 
any conversation at all, she must manage it 
herself. So she began rather timidly: “Am I 
addressing the White Queen?” 

“Well, yes, if you call that a-dressing,” the 
Queen said. “It isn’t my notion of the thing, 
at all. ’ ’ 

Alice thought it would never do to have an 
argument at the very beginning of their con- 
versation, so she smiled and said, “If your 
Majesty will only tell me the right way to be- 
gin, I’ll do it as well as I can.” 

“But I don’t want it done at all!” groaned 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


73 


the poor Queen. “I’ve been a- dressing my- 
self for the last two hours.’’ 

It would have been all the better, as it 
seemed to Alice, if she had got some one else 
to dress her, she was so dreadfully untidy. 



“Every single thing’s crooked,” Alice thought 

to herself, “and she’s all over pins! May 

I put your shawl straight for you?’’ she added 
aloud. 

“I don’t know what’s the matter with it!” 



74 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 

the Queen said, in a melancholy voice. “It’s 
out of temper, I think. I’ve pinned it here, 
and I’ve pinned it there, but there’s no pleas- 
ing it!” 

“It can’t go straight, you know, if you pin 
it all on one side, ’ ’ Alice said, as she gently 
put it right for her; “and, dear me, what a 
state your hair is in!” 

“The brush has got entangled in it!’’ the 
Queen said with a sigh. “And I lost the comb 
yesterday. ’ ’ 

Alice carefully released the brush, and did 
her best to get the hair into order. “Come, 
you look rather better now!” she said, after 
altering most of the pins. “But really you 
should have a lady’s-maid!” 

“I’m sure I’ll take you with pleasure!” the 
Queen said. “Twopence a week, and jam 
every other day. ” 

Alice couldn’t help laughing, as she said, “I 
don’t want you to hire me — and I don’t care 
for jam.” 

“It’s very good jam,” said the Queen. 

“Well, I don’t want any to-day, at any rate. ” 

“You couldn’t have it if you did want it, ” 
the Queen said. “The rule is, jam to-morrow 
and jam yesterday — but never jam to-day.” 

“It must come sometimes to ‘jam to-day,’ ” 
Alice objected. 

“No, it can’t,” said the Queen. “It’s jam 
every other day: to-day isn’t any other day, 
you know. ” 

“I don’t understand you,” said Alice. “It’s 
dreadfully confusing!” 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


75 


“That’s the effect of living backwards,” the 
Queen said kindly: “it always makes one a lit- 
tle giddy at first ” 

“Living backwards! “Alice repeated in great 
astonishment. “I never heard of such a 
thing!” 

“ — but there’s one great advantage in it, 
that one’s memory works both ways.” 

“I’m sure mine only works one way,” Alice 
remarked. “I can’t remember things before 
they happen. ” 

“It’s a poor sort of memory that only works 
backwards,” the Queen remarked. 

“What sort of things do you remember 
best?” Alice ventured to ask. 

“Oh, things that happened the week after 
next,” the Queen replied in a careless tone. 
“For instance, now,” she went on, sticking a 
large piece of plaster on her finger as she 
spoke, “there’s the King’s Messenger. He’s 
in prison now, being punished : and the trial 
doesn’t even begin till next Wednesday: and of 
course the crime comes last of all.” 

“Suppose he never commits the crime?” 
said Alice. 

“That would be all the better, wouldn’t it?” 
the Queen said, as she bound the plaster round 
her finger with a bit of ribbon. 

Alice felt there was no denying that. “Of 
course it would be all the better,” she said: 
“but it wouldn’t be all the better his being 
punished. ” 

“You’re wrong there, at any rate,” said the 
Queen. “Were you ever punished?” 


76 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


“Only for faults,” said Alice. 

“And you were all the better for it, I 
know!” the Queen said triumphantly. 

“Yes, but then I had done the things I 
was punished for,” said Alice: “that makes 
all the difference.” 

“But if you hadn’t done them,” the Queen 
said, “that would have been better still; bet- 
ter, and better, and better!” Her voice went 
higher with each “better,” till it got quite to 
a squeak at last. 

Alice was just beginning to say, “There’s a 

mistake somewhere ,” when the Queen 

began screaming, so loud that she had to leave 
the sentence unfinished. “Oh, oh, oh!” 
shouted the Queen, shaking her hand about as 
if she wanted to shake it off. “My finger’s 
bleeding! Oh, oh, oh, oh!” 

Her screams were so exactly like the whistle 
of a steam-engine, that Alice had to hold both 
her hands over her ears. 

“What is the matter?” she said, as soon as 
there was a chance of making herself heard. 
“Have you pricked your finger?” 

“I haven’t pricked it yet,” the Queen said, 
“but I soon shall — oh, oh, oh!” 

“When do you expect to do it?” Alice asked, 
feeling very much inclined to laugh. 

“When I fasten my shawl again,” the poor 
Queen groaned out: “the brooch will come 
undone directly. Oh, oh!” As she said the 
words the brooch flew open, and the Queen 
clutched wildly at it, and tried to clasp it 
again. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


77 


“Take care!” cried Alice. “You’re holding 
it all crooked!” And she caught at the 
brooch; but it was too late: the pin had 
slipped, and the Queen had pricked her finger. 

“That accounts for the bleeding, you see,” 
she said to Alice with a smile. “Now you un- 
derstand the way things happen here.” 

“But why don’t you scream now?” Alice 
asked, holding her hands ready to put over her 
ears again. 

“Why, I’ve done all the screaming already,” 
said the Queen. “What would be the good of 
having it all over again?” 

By this time it was getting light. “The 
crow must have flown away, I think,” said 
Alice: “I’m so glad it’s gone. I thought it 
was the night coming on. ” 

“I wish I could manage to be glad!” the 
Queen said. “Only I never can remember the 
rule. You must be very happy, living in this 
wood, and being glad whenever you like!” 

“Only it is so very lonely here!” Alice said 
in a melancholy voice ; and, at the thought of 
her loneliness, two large tears came rolling 
down her cheeks. 

“Oh, don’t go on like that!” cried the poor 
Queen, wringing her hands in despair. “Con- 
sider what a great girl you are. Consider what 
a long way you’ve come to-day. Consider what 
o’clock it is. Consider anything, only don’t 
cry!” 

Alice could not help laughing at this, even 
in the midst of her tears. “Can you keep 
from crying by considering things?” she asked. 


78 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 

“That’s the way it’s done,” the Queen said 
with great decision: “nobody can do two 
things at once, you know. Let’s consider your 
age to begin with — how old are you?” 

“I’m seven and a half, exactly.” 

“You needn’t say ‘exactually, ’ ” the Queen 
remarked. “I can believe it without that. 
Now I’ll give you something to believe. I’m 
just one hundred and one, five months and a 
day. ’ ’ 

“I can’t believe that!” said Alice. 

“Can’t you?” the Queen said in a pitying 
tone. “Try again: draw a long breath, and 
shut your eyes. ’ ’ 

Alice laughed. “There’s no use trying,’* 
she said: “one can’t believe impossible 
things. ’ ’ 

“I daresay you haven’t had much practice,” 
said the Queen. “When I was your age, I 
always did it for half an hour a day. Why, 
sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impos- 
sible things before breakfast. There goes the 
shawl again!” 

The brooch had come undone as she 
spoke, and a sudden gust of wind blew the 
Queen’s shawl across a little brook. The 
queen spread out her arms again, and went 
flying after it, and this time she succeeded in 
catching it for herself. “I’ve got it!” she 
cried in a triumphant tone. “Now you shall 
see me pin it on again, all by myself!” 

“Then I hope your finger is better now?” 
Alice said very politely, as she crossed the 
little brook after the Queen. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


79 


****** 

***** 

****** 

“Oh, much better!” cried the Queen, her 
voice rising into a squeak as she went on. 
“Much be-etter! Be-e-e-etter ! Be-e-ehh!” 
The last word ended in a long bleat, so like a 
sheep that Alice quite started. 

She looked at the Queen, who seemed to 
have suddenly wrapped herself up in wool. 
Alice rubbed her eyes, and looked again. She 
couldn’t make out what had happened at all. 
Was she in a shop? And was that really — was 
it really a sheep that was sitting on the other 
side of the counter? Rub as she would, she 
could make nothing more of it : she was in a 
little dark shop, leaning with her elbows on 
the countei, and opposite to her was an old 
Sheep, sitting in an arm-chair, knitting, and 
every now and then leaving off to look at her 
through a great pair of spectacles. 

“What is it you want to buy?” the Sheep 
said at last, looking up for a moment from her 
knitting. 

“I don’t quite know yet,” Alice said very 
gently. “I should like to look around me first, 
if I might. ” 

“You may look in front of you, and on both 
sides, if you like,” said the Sheep; “but you 
can’t look all round you — unless you’ve got 
eyes at the back of your head. ’ ’ 

But these, as it happened, Alice had not got ; 
so she contented herself with turning round, 
looking at the shelves as she came to them. 


80 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


The shop seemed to be full of all manner of 
curious things— but the oddest part of it all 
was that, whenever she looked hard at any 



shelf, to make out exactly what it had on it, 
that particular shelf was always quite empty, 
though the others round it were crowded as 
full as they could hold. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


81 


“Things flow about so here!” she said at 
last in a plaintive tone, after she had spent a 
minute or so in vainly pursuing a large bright 
thing, that looked sometimes like a doll and 
sometimes like a work-box, and was always in 
the shelf next above the one she was looking at. 
“And this one is the most provoking of all — 
but ITl tell you what — ” she added, as a sud- 
den thought struck her. “ITl follow it up to 
the very top shelf of all. It’ll puzzle it to go 
through the ceiling, I expect!” 

But even this plan failed: the “thing” went 
through the ceiling as quietly as possible, as if 
it were quite used to it. 

“Are you a child or a teetotum?” the Sheep 
said, as she took up another pair of needles. 
“You’ll make me giddy soon, if 3’’ou go on 
turning round like that. ” She was now work- 
ing with fourteen pairs at once, and Alice 
couldn’t help looking at her in great astonish- 
ment. 

“How can she knit with so many?” the 
puzzled child thought to herself. “She gets 
more and more like a porcupine every minute ! ’ ’ 

“Can you row?” the Sheep asked, handing 
her a pair of knitting-needles as she spoke. 

“Yes, a little — but not on land — and not 

with needles ” Alice was beginning to say, 

when suddenly the needles turned into oars in 
her hands, and she found they were in a little 
boat, gliding along between banks: so there 
was nothing for it but to do her best. 

“Feather!” cried the Sheep, as she took up 
another pair of needles. 

6 Looking Glass ’ 


82 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


This didn’t sound like a remark that needed 
any answer: so Alice said nothing, but pulled 
away. There was something very queer about 
the water, she thought, as every now and then 
the oars got fast in it, and would hardly come 
out again. 

“Feather! Feather!” the Sheep cried again, 
taking more needles. “You’ll be catching a 
crab directly. ’ ’ 

“A dear little crab!” thought Alice. “I 
should like that. ’ ’ 

“Didn’t you hear me say ‘Feather’?” the 
Sheep cried angrily, taking up quite a bunch 
of needles. 

“Indeed I did,” said Alice: “you’ve said it 
very often — and very loud. Please where are 
the crabs?” 

“In the water, of course!” said the Sheep, 
sticking some of the needles into her hair, as 
her hands were full. “Feather, I say!” 

“Why do you say ‘Feather’ so often?” Alice 
asked at last, rather vexed. “I’m not a 
bird!” 

“You are,” said the Sheep: “you’re a little 
goose. ’ ’ 

This offended Alice a little, so there was no 
more conversation for a minute or two, while 
the boat glided gently on, sometimes among 
beds of weeds (which made the oars stick fast 
in the water, worse than ever), and sometimes 
under trees, but always with the same tall 
river-banks frowning over their heads. 

“Oh, please! There are some scented 
rushes!” Alice cried in a sudden transport 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


of delight. “There really are — arid such 
beauties!” 

“You needn’t say ‘please’ to me about ’em,” 
the Sheep said, without looking up from her 
knitting: “I didn’t put ’em there, and I’m not 
going to take ’em away.” 

“No, but I meant — please, may we wait and 
pick some?” Alice pleaded. “If you don’t 
mind stopping the boat for a minute.” 

“How am I to stop it?” said the Sheep. “If 
you leave off rowing, it’ll stop of itself.” 

So the boat was left to drift down the 
stream as it would, till it glided gently 
in among the waving rushes. And then 
the little sleeves were carefully rolled 
up, and the little arms were plunged 
in elbow-deep, to get hold of the rushes 
a good long way down before breaking 
them off — and for a while Alice forgot all about 
the Sheep and the knitting, as she bent over 
the side of the boat, with just the ends of her 
tangled hair dripping into the water — while 
with bright eager eyes she caught at one bunch 
after another of the darling scented rushes. 

“I only hope the boat won’t tipple over!” she 
said to herself. “Oh, what a lovely one! 
Only I couldn’t quite reach it.” And it cer- 
tainly did seem a little provoking (“almost as 
if it happened on purpose,” she thought) that, 
though she managed to pick plenty of beauti- 
ful rushes as the boat glided by, there was 
always a more lovely one that she couldn’t 
reach. 

“The prettiest are always further!” she said 


84 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


at last, with a sigh at the obstinacy of the 
rushes in growing so far off, with flushed 
cheeks and dripping hair and hands, she 
scrambled back into her place, and began to 
arrange her new-found treasures. 

What mattered it to her just then that the 
rushes had begun to fade, and to lose all their 
scent and beauty, from the very moment that 
she picked them? Even real scented rushes, 
you know, last only a very little while — and 
these, being dream-rushes, melted away almost 
like snow, as they lay in heaps at her feet — but 
Alice hardly noticed this, there were so many 
other curious things to think about. 

They hadn’t gone much farther before the 
blade of one of the oars got fast in the water 
and wouldn’t come out again (so Alice 
explained it afterwards), and the consequence 
was that the handle of it caught her under the 
chin, and, in spite of a series of little shrieks 
of “Oh, oh, oh!” from poor Alice, it swept her 
straight off the seat, and down among the heap 
of rushes. 

However, she wasn’t a bit hurt, and was 
soon up again : the Sheep went on with her 
knitting all the while, just as if nothing had 
happened. “That was a nice crab you 
caught!’’ she remarked, as Alice got back into 
her place, very much relieved to And herself 
still in the boat. 

“Was it? I didn’t see it,’’ said Alice, peep- 
ing cautiously over the side of the boat into 
the dark water. “I wish it hadn’t let go — I 
should so like a little crab to take home with 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


85 


me!” But the Sheep only laughed scornfully, 
and went on with her knitting. 

‘‘Are there many crabs here?” said Alice. 



‘‘Crabs, and all sorts of things,” said the 
Sheep; ‘‘plenty of choice, only make up your 
mind. Now, what do you want to buy?” 

‘‘To buy!” Alice echoed in a tone that was 


86 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


half astonished and half frightened — for the 
oars, and the boat, and the river, had vanished 
all in a moment, and she was back again in the 
little dark shop. 

“I should like to buy an egg, please,” she 
said timidly. ‘‘How do you sell them?” 

‘‘Fivepence farthing for one — twopence for 
two, ’ ’ the Sheep replied. 

‘‘Then two are cheaper than one?” Alice said 
in a surprised tone, taking out her purse. 

‘‘Only you must eat them both, if you buy 
two,” said the Sheep. 

‘‘Then ITl have one, please,” said Alice, as 
she put the money down on the counter. For 
she thought to herself, ‘‘They mightn’t be at 
all nice, you know.” 

The Sheep took the money, and put it away 
in a box; then she said never put things 
into people’s hands — that would never do — you 
must get it for yourself. ’ ’ And so saying, she 
went off to the other end of the shop, and set 
the egg upright on a shelf. 

‘‘I wonder why it wouldn’t do?” thought 
Alice, as she groped her way among the tables 
and chairs, for the shop was very dark towards 
the end. ‘‘The egg seems to get further away 
the more I walk towards it. Let me see, is 
this a chair? Why, it’s got branches, I declare ! 
How very odd to find trees growing here! 
And actually here’s a little brook! Well, this 
is the very queerest shop I ever saw!” 

****** 

***** 

****** 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


87 


So she went on, wondering more and more 
at every step, as everything turned into a tree 
the moment she came up to it, and she quite 
expected the egg to do the same. 


88 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


CHAPTER VI. 

HUMPTY DUMPTY. 

However, the egg only got larger and larger, 
and more and more human: when she had 
come within a few yards of it, she saw that it 
had eyes and a nose and mouth ; and, when 
she had come close to it, she saw clearly that 
it was HUMPTY DUMPTY himself. “It can’t 
be anybody else!’’ she said to herself. “I’m 
as certain of it, as if his name were written all 
over his face!’’ 

It might have been written a hundred times, 
easily, on that endtinoiis' face. Humpty 
Dumpty was sitting, with his legs crossed like 
a Turk, on the top of a high wall — such a nar- 
row one that Alice quite wondered how he 
could keep his balance — and, as his eyes were 
steadily fixed in the opposite direction, and he 
didn’t take the least notice of her, she thought 
he must be a stuffed figure, after all. 

“And how exactly like an egg he is!’’ she 
said aloud, standing with her hands ready to 
catch him, for she was every moment expecting 
him to fall. 

“It’s very provoking,’’ Humpty Dumpty 
said after a long silence, looking away from 
Alice as bespoke, “to be called an egg — ver}^’’ 

“I said you looked like an egg, Sir,’’ Alice 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


89 


gently explained. “And some eggs are very 
pretty, you know, ’ ’ she added, hoping to turn 
her remark into a sort of compliment. 

“Some people,” said Humpty Dumpty, look- 
ing away from her as usual, “have no more 
sense than a baby!” 

Alice didn’t know what to say to this: it 
wasn’t at all like conversation, she thought, 
as he never said anything to her ; in fact, his 
last remark was evidently addressed to a tree 
— so she stood and softly repeated to herself : — 

“Humphy Dumpty sat on a wall: 

Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. 

All the King’s horses and all the King’s men 
Couldn’t put Humpty Dumpty in his place 
again. ’ ’ 

“That last line is much too long for the 
poetry,” she added, almost out loud, forget- 
ting that Humpty Dumpty would hear her. 

“Don’t stand chattering to yourself like 
that, ’ ’ Humpty Dumpty said, looking at her 
for the first time, “but tell me your name and 
your business. ” 

“My name is Alice, but “ 

“It’s a stupid name enough!” Humpty 
Dumpty interrupted impatiently. “What does 
it mean?” 

“Must a name mean something?” Alice 
asked doubtfully. 

“Of course it must,” Humpty Dumpty said 
with a short laugh : my name means the shape 
I am and a good handsome shape it is, too. 


90 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 

With a name like yours, you might be any 
shape, almost. ’ ’ 

“Why do you sit out here all alone?” said 
Alice, not wishing to begin an argument. 

“Why, because there’s nobody with me!” 
cried Humpty Dumpty. “Did you think I 
didn’t know the answer to that? Ask 
another. ” 

“Don’t you think you’d be safer down on 
the ground?” Alice went on, not with any idea 
of making another riddle, but simply in her 
good-natured anxiety for the queer creature. 
“That wall is so very narrow!” 

“What tremendously easy riddles you ask!” 
Humpty Dumpty growled out. “Of course I 
don’t think so! Why, if ever I did fall off — 

which there’s no chance of — but if I did ” 

Here he pursed up his lips, and looked so 
solemn and grand that Alice could hardly help 
laughing. “If I did fall, ” he went on, “the 
King has promised me — ah, you may turn pale, 
if you like! You didn’t think I was going to 
say that, did you? The King has promised 
me — with his very own mouth — to — to — ” 

“To send all his horses and all his men, ” 
Alice interrupted, rather unwisely. 

“Now I declare that’s too bad!” Humpty 
Dumpty cried, breaking into a sudden passion. 
“You’ve been listening at doors —and behind 
trees — and down chimneys — or you couldn’t 
have known it!” 

“I haven’t, indeed!” Alice said very gently. 
“It’s in a book.” 

“Ah, well! They may write such things 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


91 



in a book,” Humpty 
Dumpty said in a calm- 
er tone. “That’s what 
you call a History of 
England, that is. Now, 
take a good look at mei 
I’m one that has spoken 
to a King, I am: may 
hap you’ll never see 
such another: and, to 
show you I’m not proud, 
you may shake hands 
with me!” And he grinned almost from ear 
to ear, as he leant forwards (and as nearly as 
possible fell off the wall in doing so) and offered 
Alice his hand. She watched him a little 
anxiously as she took it. “If he smiled much 
more the ends of his mouth might meet be- 
hind,” she thought: “and then I don’t know 
what would happen to his head! I’m afraid it 
would come off!” 


92 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


“Yes, all his horses and all his men,” 
Hnmpty Dumpty went on. “They’d pick me 
up again in a minute, they would! However, 
this conversation is going on a little too fast: 
let’s go back to the last remark but one. ” 

“I’m afraid I can’t quite remember it,” 
Alice said, very politely. 

“In that case we start afresh,” said Humpty 
Dumpty, “and it’s my turn to choose a sub- 
ject ” (“He talks about it just as if it was 

a game!” thought Alice.) “So here’s a ques- 
tion for you. How old did you say you were?” 

Alice made a short calculation, and said 
“Seven years and six months.” 

“Wrong!” Humpty Dumpty exclaimed tri- 
umphantly. “You never said a word like it!” 

“I thought you meant ‘How old are you?’ ” 
Alice explained. 

“If I’d meant that, I’d have said it,” said 
Humpty Dumpty. 

Alice didn’t want to begin another argu- 
ment, so she said nothing. 

“Seven years and six months!” Humpty 
Dumpty repeated thoughtfully. “An uncom- 
fortable sort of age. Now if you’d asked my 

advice, I’d have said ‘Leave off at seven’ 

but it’s too late now. ” 

“I never ask advice about growing,” Alice 
said indignantly. 

“Too proud!” the other enquired. 

Alice felt even more indignant at this sug- 
gestion. “I mean,” she said, “that one can’t 
help growing older. ’ ’ 

“One can’t, perhaps,” said Humpty 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


93 


Dumpty; “but two can. With proper assist- 
ance, you might have left off at seven. “ 

“What a beautiful belt you’ve got on!” Alice 
suddenly remarked. (They had had quite 
enough of the subject of age, she thought: 
and, if they really were to take turns in 
choosing subjects, it was her turn now.) “At 
least,” she corrected herself on second 
thoughts, “a beautiful cravat, I should have 
said — no, a belt, I mean — I beg your pardon!” 
she added in dismay, for Humpty Dumpty 
looked thoroughly offended, and she began to 
wish she hadn’t chosen that subject. “If only 
I knew,” she thought to herself, “which was- 
neck and which was waist!” 

Evidently Humpty Dumpty was very angry, 
though he said nothing for a minute or two. 
When he did speak again, it was in a deep 
growl. 

“It is a — most — provoking — thing,” he said 
at last, “when a person doesn’t know a cravat 
from a belt ! ’ ’ 

“I know it’s very ignorant of me,” Alice 
said, in so humble a tone that Humpty Dumpty 
relented. 

“It’s a cravat, child, and a beautiful one, as 
you say. It’s a present from the White King 
and Queen. There now!” 

“Is it really?” said Alice, quite pleased to find 
that she had chosen a good subject, after all. 

“They gave it me,” Humpty Dumpty con- 
tinued thoughtfully, as he crossed one knee 
over the other and clasped his hands round it. 


94 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


“ they gave it me — for an un-birthday pres- 
ent.” 

“I beg your pardon?” Alice said with a puz- 
zled air. 

“Tm not offended,” said Humpty Dumpty. 

“I mean, what is an un-birthday present?” 

“A present given when it isn't your birth- 
day, of course. ’ ’ 

Alice considered a little. “I like birthday 
presents best, ’ ’ she said at last. 

“You don’t know what you’re talking 
about!” cried Humpty Dumpty. ‘‘How many 
days are there in a year?” 

“Three hundred and sixty-five,” said Alice. 

“And how many birthdays have you?” 

“One. ” 

“And if you take one from three hundred 
and sixty-five, what remains?” 

“Three hundred and sixty-four, of course.” 

Humpty Dumpty looked doubtful. “I’d 
rather see that done on paper,” he said. 

Alice couldn’t help smiling as she took out 
her memorandum book, and worked the sum 
for him : 

365 

I 


364 


Humpty Dumpty took the book, and looked 
at it carefully. “That seems to be done right 
” he began. 

“You’re holding it upside down!” Alice 
interrupted. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


95 


“To be sure I was!” Humpty Dumpty said 
gaily, as she turned it round for him. “I 
thought it looked a little queer. As I v/as say- 
ing, that seems to be done right— though I 
haven’t time to look it over thoroughly just 
now — and that shows that there are three hun- 
dred and sixty-four days when you might get 
un-birthday presents ’’ 

“Certainly,” said Alice. 

“And only one for birthday presents, you 
know. There’s glory for you!” 

“I don’t know what you mean by ‘glory,’ ” 
Alice said. 

Humpty Dumpty smiled contemptuously. 
“Of course you don’t — till I tell you. I meant 
‘there’s a nice knock-down argument for 
you!’ ” 

“But ‘glory’ doesn’t mean ‘a nice knock- 
down argument,' ” Alice objected. 

“When I use a word,” Humpty Dumpty 
said, in rather a scornful tone, “it means just 
what I choose it to mean — neither more nor 
less. ” 

“The question is,” said Alice, “whether you 
can make words mean so many different 
things. ” 

“The question is,” said Humpty Dumpty, 
“which is to be master that’s all.” 

Alice was too much puzzled to say anything; 
so after a minute Humpty Dumpty began 
again. “They’ve a temper, some of them — 
particularly verbs: they’re the proudest — 
adjectives you can do anything with, but not 
verbs — however, I can manage the whole lot 


96 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


of them! Impenetrability! That’s what I 
say ! ’ ’ 

“Would you tell me, please,” said Alice, 
“what that means?’’ 

“Now you talk like a reasonable child,’’ said 
Humpty Dumpty, looking very much pleased. 
“I meant by ‘impenetrability’ that we’ve had 
enough of that subject, and it would be just as 
well if you’d mention what you mean to do 
next, as I suppose you don’t mean to stop here 
all the rest of your life. ’’ 

“That’s a great deal to make one word 
mean,” Alice said in a thoughtful tone. 

“When I make a word do a lot of work like 
that,” said Humpty Dumpty, “I always pay it 
extra. ’ ’ 

“Oh!” said Alice. She was too much puz- 
zled to make any other remark. 

“Ah, you should see ’em come round me of 
a Saturday night,” Humpty Dumpty went on, 
wagging his head gravely from side to side, 
“for to get their wages, you know.” 

(Alice didn’t venture to ask what he paid 
them with ; and so you see I can’t tell you.) 

“You seem very clever at explaining words, 
Sir,” said Alice. “Would you kindly tell me 
the meaning of the poem called ‘Jabber- 
wocky’?” 

“Let’s hear it,” said Humpty Dumpty. “I 
can explain all the poems that ever were in- 
vented — and a good many that haven’t been 
invented just yet.” 

This sounded very hopeful, so Alice repeated 
the first verse 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


97 


“ ’Twas brillig, and the slithy toves 
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe : 

All mimsy were the borogoves, 

And the mome raths outgrabe. ’ ’ 

“That’s enough to begin with,’’ Humpty 
Dumpty interrupted: “there are plenty of 
hard words there. ‘Brillig’ means four o’clock 
in the afternoon — the time when you begin 
broiling things for dinner.” 

“That’ll do very well,’’ said Alice: “and 
‘slithy’?” 

“Well, ‘slithy’ means Tithe and slimy.’ 
‘Lithe’ is the same as ‘active.’ You see it’s 
like a portmanteau — there are two meanings 
packed up into one word.” 

‘ ‘ I see it now, ’ ’ Alice remarked thoughtfully : 
“and what are ‘toves’?” 

“Well, ‘toves’ are something like badgers — 
they’re something like lizards — and they’re 
something like corkscrews.” 

“They must be very curious-looking crea- 
tures. ’ ’ 

“They are that,” said Humpty Dumpty: 
“also they make their nests under sun-dials — 
also they live on cheese.” 

“And what’s to ‘gyre’ and to ‘gimble’?” 

“To ‘gyre’ is to go round and round like a 
gyroscope. To ‘gimble’ is to make holes like 
a gimblet. ” 

“And ‘the wabe’ is the grass-plot round a 
sun-dial, I suppose?” said Alice, surprised at 
her own ingenuity, 

“Of course it is. It’s called ‘wabe,’ you 

7 Looking Glass 


98 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


know, becBUse it goes a long way before it, and 

a long way behind it ” 

“And a long way beyond it on each side,” 
Alice added. 



“Exactly so. Well then, ‘mimsy’ is ‘flimsy 
and miserable’ (there’s another portmanteau 
for you). And a ‘borogove’ is a thin shabby- 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


99 


looking bird with its feathers sticking out all 
round — something like a live mop. ” 

“And then ‘mome raths’?” said Alice. “I’m 
afraid I’m giving you a great deal of trouble.’’ 

“Well, a ‘rath’ is a sort of green pig: but 
‘mome’ I’m not certain about. I think it’s 
short for ‘from home’ — meaning that they’d 
lost their way, you know. ’ ’ 

“And what does ‘outgrabe’ mean?’’ 

“Well, ‘outgribing’ is something between 
bellowing and whistling, with a kind of sneeze 
in the middle: however, you’ll hear it done, 
maybe — down in the wood yonder — and, when 
you’ve once heard it, you’ll be quite content. 
Who’s been repeating all that hard stuff to 
you?’’ 

“I read it in a book,’’ said Alice. “But I 
had some poetry repeated to me much easier 
than that, by — Tweedledee, I think it was.’’ 

“As to poetry, you know,” said Humpty 
Dumpty, stretching out one of his great hands, 
“I can repeat poetry as well as other folk, if 
it comes to that ’’ 

“Oh, it needn’t come to that!” Alice hastily 
said, hoping to keep him from beginning. 

“The piece I’m going to repeat, ” he went on 
without noticing her remark, “was written 
entirely for your amusement.” 

Alice felt that in that case she really ought 
to listen to it; so she sat down, and said 
“Thank you” rather sadly. 

“In winter, when the fields are white, 

I sing this song for your delight 


100 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


only I don’t sing it,” he added, as an expla- 
nation. 

‘‘I see you don’t,” said Alice. 

“If you can see whether I’m singing or not, 
you’ve sharper eyes than most,” Humpty 
Dumpty remarked severely. Alice was silent. 

‘‘In spring, when woods are getting green. 
I’ll try and tell you what I mean:” 

“Thank you very much,” said Alice. 

“In summer, when the days are long, 
Perhaps you’ll understand the song: 

In autumn, when the leaves are brown. 
Take pen and ink, and write it down. ” 

“I will, if I can remember it so long,” said 
Alice. 

“You needn’t go on making remarks like 
that,” Humpty Dumpty said: “the3s^’re not 
sensible, and they put me out.” 

“I sent a message to the fish: 

I told them ‘This is what I wish.’ 

The little fishes of the sea. 

They sent an answer back to me. 

The little fishes’ answer was 

‘We cannot do it. Sir, because ’ ” 

“I’m afraid I don’t quite understand,” said 
Alice. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


101 


‘ ‘ It Rets easier further on, ’ ’ Humpty Dumpty 
replied. 

“I sent to them again to say 
‘It will be better to obey.’ 

The fishes answered, with a grin, 

‘Why, what a temper you are in!’ 

I told them once, I told them twice : 

They would not listen to advice. 

I took a kettle large and new, 

Fit for the deed I had to do. 

My heart went hop, my heart went thump: 
I filled the kettle at the pump. 

Then some one came to me and said 
‘The little fishes are in bed.’ 

I said to him, I said it plain, 

‘Then you must wake them up again.’ 

I said it very loud and clear : 

I went and shouted in his ear.” 

Humpty Dumpty raised his voice almost to 
a scream as he repeated this verse, and Alice 
thought, with a shudder, “I wouldn’t have 
been the messenger for anything!” 

‘‘But he was very stiff and proud: 

He said ‘You needn’t shout so loud!’ 


102 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


And he was very proud and stiff : 

He said ‘I’d go and wake them, if ’ 

I took a corkscrew from the shelf : 

I went to wake them up myself. 

And when I found the door was locked, 

I pulled and pushed and kicked and knocked. 

And when I found the door was shut, 

I tried to turn the handle, but ” 

There was a long pause. 

“Is that all?” Alice timidly asked. 

“That’s all,” said Humpty Dumpty. “Good 
bye. ’ ’ 

This was rather sudden, Alice thought: but, 
after such a very strong hint that she ought to 
be going, she felt that it would hardly be civil 
to stay. So she got up, and held out her hand. 
“Good-bye, till we meet again!” she said as 
cheerfully as she could. 

“I shouldn’t know you again if we did meet,” 
Humpty Dumpty replied in a discontented 
tone, giving her one of his fingers to shake: 
“you’re so exactly like other people.” 

“The face is what one goes by, generally,” 
Alice remarked in a thoughtful tone. 

“That’s just what I complain of,” said 
Humpty Dumpty. “Your face is the same as 
everybody has — the two eyes, so ” (mark- 

ing their places in the air with his thumb) 
“nose in the middle, mouth under. It’s 
alv/ays the same. Now if you had the two 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 103 


eyes on the same side of the nose, for instance 
— or the mouth at the top — that would be some 
help. ” 

“It wouldn’t look nice, ’’ Alice objected. 
But Humpty Dumpty only shut his eyes, and 
said “Wait till you’ve tried.’’ 

Alice waited a minute to see if he would 
speak again, but, as he never opened his eyes 
or took any further notice of her, she said 
“Good-bye!’’ once more, and, getting no 
answer to this, she quietly walked away: but 
she couldn’t help saying to herself, as she 

went, “Of all the unsatisfactory ’’ (she 

repeated this aloud, as it was a great comfort 
to have such a long word to say) “of all the 

unsatisfactory people I ever met ’’ She 

never finished the sentence, for at this mo- 
ment a heavy crash shook the forest from end 
to end. 


104 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


CHAPTER VII. 

THE LION AND THE UNICORN. 

The next moment soldiers came running* 
through the wood, at first in twos and threes, 
then ten or twenty together, and at last in 
such crowds that they seemed to fill the whole 
forest. Alice got behind a tree, for fear of 
being run over, and watched them go by. 

She thought that in all her life she had 
never seen soldiers so uncertain on their feet : 
they were always tripping over something or 
other, and whenever one went down, several 
more always fell over him, so that the ground 
was soon covered with little heaps of men. 

Then came the horses. Having four feet, 
these managed rather better than the foot- 
soldiers; but even they stumbled now and 
then ; and it seemed to be a regular rule that, 
whenever a horse stumbled, the rider fell off 
instantly. The confusion got worse every 
moment, and Alice was very glad to get out 
of the wood into an open place, where she 
found the White King, seated on the ground, 
busily writing in his memorandum-book. 

“IVe sent them all!” the King cried in a 
tone of delight, on seeing Alice. “Did you 
happen to meet any soldiers, my dear, as you 
came through the wood?” 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 105 


“Yes, I did,” said Alice; “several thou- 
sand, I should think.” 

“Four thousand two hundred and seven, 
that’s the exact number,” the King said, re- 



ferring to his book. “I couldn’t send all the 
horses, you know, because two of them are 
wanted in the game. And I haven’t sent the 


106 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


two Messengers, either. They’re both gone 
to the town. Just look along the road, and 
tell me if you can see either of them. 

‘ ‘ I see nobody on the road, ’ ’ said Alice. 

“I only wish I had such eyes,” the King re- 
marked, in a fretful tone. “To be able to see 
Nobody! And at that distance, too! Why, it’s 
as much as I can do to see real people, by this 
light!” 

All this was lost on Alice, who was still look- 
ing intently along the road, shading her eyes 
with one hand. ‘T see somebody now !” she 
exclaimed at last. “But he’s coming very 
slowly — and what curious attitudes he goes 
into!” (For the Messenger kept skipping up 
and down, and wriggling like an eel, as he 
came along, with his great hands spread out 
like fans on each side.) 

“Not at all,” said the King. “He’s an 
Anglo-Saxon Messenger — and those are Anglo- 
Saxon attitudes. He only does them when 
he’s happy. His name is Haigha. ” (He pro- 
nounced it so as to rhyme with “mayor.”) 

“I love my love with a H,” Alice couldn’t 
help beginning, “because he is Happy. I hate 
him with an H, because he is Hideous. I fed 
him with — with — with Ham-sandwiches and 
Hay. His name is Haigha, and he lives ” 

“He lives on the Hill,” the King remarked 
simply, without the least idea that he was 
joining in the game, while Alice was still hes- 
itating for the name of a town beginning with 
H. “The other Messenger’s called Hatta. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 107 


I must have two, you know — to come and go. 
One to come, and one to go.” 

“I beg your pardon?” said Alice. 

“It isn’t respectable to beg,” said the King. 

“I only meant that I didn’t understand,” 
said Alice. “Why one to come and one to go?” 

“Don’t I tell you?” the King repeated im- 
patiently. “I must have two — to fetch and 
carry. One to fetch, and one to carry. ’ ’ 



At this moment the Messenger arrived : he 
was far too much out of breath to say a word, 
and could only wave his hands about, and 
make the most fearful faces at the poor King. 

“This young lady loves you with an H,” the 
King said, introducing Alice in the hope of 


108 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


turning off the Messenger’s attention from him- 
self — but it was of no use — the Anglo-Saxon 
attitudes only got more extraordinary every 
moment, while the great eyes rolled wildly from 
side to side. 

“You alarm me!” said the King. “I feel 
faint — give me a ham sandwich!” 

On which the Messenger, to Alice’s great 
amusement, opened a bag that hung round his 
neck, and handed a sandwich to the King, who 
devoured it greedily. 

“Another sandwich!” said the King. 

“There’s nothing but hay left now,” the 
Messenger said, peeping into the bag. 

“Hay, then,” the King murmured in a faint 
whisper. 

Alice was glad to see that it revived him a 
good deal. “There’s nothing like eating hay 
when you’re faint,” he remarked to her, as he 
munched away. 

“I should think throwing cold water over 
you would be better,” Alice suggested; “ — or 
some sal- volatile. ’ ’ 

“I didn’t say there was nothing better,” the 
King replied. “I said there was nothing like 
it. ” Which Alice did not venture to deny. . 

“Who did you pass on the road?” the King 
went on, holding out his hand to the Messen- 
ger for some more hay. 

“Nobody,” said the Messenger. 

“Quite right,” said the King; “this young 
lady saw him, too. So, of course, Nobody 
walks slower than you. ’ ’ 

“I do my best,” the Messenger said in a 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


109 


sullen tone. “I’m sure nobody walks much 
faster than I do!” 

“He can’t do that,” said the King, “or else 
he’d have been here first. However, now 
you’ve got your breath, you may tell us what’s 
happened in the town. ” 

“I’ll whisper it,” said the Messenger, put- 
ting his hands to his mouth in the shape of a 
trumpet and stooping so as to get close to the 
King’s ear. Alice was sorry for this, as she 
wanted to hear the news, too. However, in- 
stead of whispering, he simply shouted, at the 
top of his voice, “They’re at it again!” 

“Do you call that a whisper?” cried the poor 
King, jumping up, and shaking himself. “If 
you do such a thing again, I’ll have you but- 
tered ! It went through and through my head 
like an earthquake!” 

“It would have to be a very tiny earth- 
quake!” thought Alice. “Who are at it 
again?” she ventured to ask. 

“Why, the Lion and the Unicorn, of course, ” 
said the King. 

“Fighting for the crown?” 

“Yes, to be sure,” said the King; “and the 
best of the joke is, that it’s my crown all the 
while! Let’s run and see them.” And they 
trotted off, Alice repeating to herself, as she 
ran, the words of the old song: — 


“The Lion and the Unicorn were fighting for 
the crown : 

The Lion beat the Unicorn all round the town. 


110 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


Some gave them white bread, some gave them 
brown : 

Some gave them plum-cake and drummed 
them out of town. ” 

“Does — the one — that wins — get the crown?’’ 
she asked, as well as she could, for the run 
was putting her quite out of breath. 

“Dear me, no!’’ said the King. “What an 
idea!’’ 

“Would you — be good enough ” Alice 

panted out, after running a little further, “to 
stop a minute — just to get — one’s breath 
again?” 

“I’m good enough,” the King said, “only 
I’m not strong enough. You see, a minute 
goes by so fearfully quick. You might as well 
try to stop a Bandersnatch!” 

Alice had no more breath for talking; so 
they trotted on in silence, till they came into 
sight of a great crowd, in the middle of which 
the Lion and Unicorn were fighting. They 
were in such a cloud of dust, that at first Alice 
could not make out which was which ; but she 
soon managed to distinguish the Unicorn by 
his horn. 

They placed themselves close to where 
Hatta, the other Messenger, was standing 
watching the fight, with a cup of tea in one 
hand and a piece of bread-and-butter in the 
other. 

“He’s only just out of prison, and he hadn’t 
finished his tea when he was sent in,” Haigha 
whispered to Alice; “and they only give them 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. Ill 


oyster-shells in there — so you see he’s very 
hungry and thirsty. How are you, dear child?” 
he went on, putting his arm affectionately 
round Hatta’s neck. 

Hatta looked round and nodded, and went 
on with his bread-and-butter. 



“Were you happy in prison, dear child?” 
said Haigha. 

Hatta looked round once more, and this time 
a tear or two trickled down his cheek ; but not 
a word would he say. 

“Speak, can’t you!” Haigha cried impa- 
tiently. But Hatta only munched away, and 
drank some more tea. 

“Speak, won’t you!” cried the King. 
“How are they getting on with the fight?” 


112 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


Hatta made a desperate effort, and swallowed 
a large piece of bread-and-butter. “They’re 
getting on very well,’’ he said in a choking 
voice: “each of them has been down about 
eighty-seven times.’’ 

“Then I suppose they’ll soon bring the white 
bread and the brown?’’ Alice ventured to re- 
mark. 

“It’s waiting for ’em, now,’’ said Hatta; 
“this is a bit of it as I’m eating. ’’ 

There was a pause in the fight just then, S,nd 
the Lion and the Unicorn sat down, panting, 
while the King called out, “Ten minutes 
allowed for refreshments!’’ Haigha and 
Hatta set to work at once, carrying round trays 
of white and brown bread. Alice took a piece 
to taste, but it was very dry. 

‘ ‘ I don't think they’ll fight any more to-day, ’ ’ 
the King said to Hatta: “go and order the 
drums to begin.” And Hatta went bounding 
away like a grasshopper. 

For a minute or two Alice stood silent, 
watching him. Suddenly she brightened up. 
“Look, look!” she cried, pointing eagerly. 
“ There’s the White Queen running across the 
country! She came flying out of the wood 

over yonder How fast those Queens can 

run!” 

“There’s some enemy after her, no doubt,” 
the King said, without even looking round. 
“That wood’s full of them.” 

“But aren’t you going to run and help her?” 
Alice asked, very much surprised at his taking 
it so quietly. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 113 


“No use, no use!” said the King. “She 
runs so fearfully quick. You might as well 
try to catch a Bandersnatch 1 But I’ll make a 

memorandum about her, if you like She’s 

a dear good creature, ’ ’ he repeated softly to 
himself, as he opened his memorandum-book. 
“Do you spell ‘creature’ with a double ‘e’?” 

At this moment the Unicorn sauntered by 
them, with his hands in his pockets. “I had 
the best of it this time!” he said to the King, 
just glancing at him as he passed. 

“A little — a little,” the King replied, rather 
nervously. “You shouldn’t have run him 
through with your horn, you know.” 

“It didn’t hurt him,” the Unicorn said care- 
lessly, and he was going on, when his eye hap- 
pened to fall upon Alice: he turned round 
instantly, and stood for some time looking at 
her with an air of the deepest disgust. 

“What — is — this?” he said at last. 

“This is a child!” Haigha replied eagerly, 
coming in front of Alice to introduce her, and 
spreading out both his hands towards her in 
an Anglo-Saxon attitude. “We only found it 
to-day. It’s as large as life, and twice as 
natural ! ’ ’ 

“I always thought they were fabulous mon- 
sters!” said the Unicorn. “Is it alive?” 

“It can talk,” said Haigha solemnly. 

The Unicorn looked dreamily at Alice, and 
said, “Talk, child.” 

Alice could not help her lips curling up into 
a smile as she began : “Do you know, I always 


8 Looking Glass 


114 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 

thought Unicorns were fabulous monsters, too? 
I never saw one alive before!” 

“Well, now that we have seen each other,” 
said the Unicorn, “if you’ll believe in me, I’ll 
believe in you. Is that a bargain?” 

“Yes, if you like,” said Alice. 

“Come, fetch out the plum-cake, old man!” 
the Unicorn went on, turning from her to the 
King. “None of your brown bread for me!” 



“Certainly — certainly!” the King muttered, 
and beckoned to Haigha. “Open the bag!” 
he whispered. “Quick! Not that one— that’s 
full of hay. ’ ’ 

Haigha took a large cake out of the bag, and 
gave it to Alice to hold, while he got out a 
dish and carving-knife. How they all came 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 115 


out of it Alice couldn’t guess. It was just like 
a conjuring trick, she thought. 

The Lion had joined them while this was 
going on : he looked very tired and sleepy, and 
his eyes were half shut. “What’s this!” he 
said, blinking lazily at Alice, and speaking in 
a deep hollow tone that sounded like the toll- 
ing of a great bell. 

“Ah, what is it, now?” the Unicorn cried 
eagerly. “You’ll never guess! I couldn’t.” 

The Lion looked at Alice wearily. “Are you 
animal — or vegetable or mineral?” he said, 
yawning at every other word. 

“It’s a fabulous monster!” the Unicorn cried 
out, before Alice could reply. 

“Then hand round the plum-cake. Mon- 
ster,” the Lion said, lying down and putting 
his chin on his paws. “And sit down, both of 
you,” (to the King and the Unicorn): “fair 
play with the cake, you know!” 

The King was evidently very uncomfortable 
at having to sit down between the two great 
creatures; but there was no other place for him. 

“What a fight we might have for the crown, 
now!” the Unicorn said, looking slyly up at 
the crown, which the poor King was nearly 
shaking off his head, he trembled so much. 

“I should win easy,” said the Lion. 

“I’m not so sure of that,” said the Unicorn. 

“Why, I beat you all round the town, you 
chicken!” the Lion replied angrily, half get- 
ting up as he spoke. 

Here the King interrupted, to prevent the 
quarrel going on: he was very nervous, and 


116 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


his voice quite quivered. “All round the 
town?” he said. “That’s a good long way. 
Did you go by the old bridge, or the market- 
place? You get the best view by the old 
bridge. ’ ’ 

“I’m sure I don’t know,” the Lion growled 
out as he lay down again. “There was too 
much dust to see anything. What a time the 
Monster is, cutting up that cake!” 

Alice had seated herself on the bank of a lit- 
tle brook, with the great dish on her knees, 
and was sawing away diligently with the 
knife. “It’s very provoking!” she said, in 
reply to the Lion (she was getting quite used 
to being called ‘the Monster’). “I’ve cut sev- 
eral slices already, but they always join on 
again ! ’ ’ 

“You don’t know how to manage Looking- 
glass cakes,” the Unicorn remarked. “Hand 
it round first, and cut it afterwards.” 

This sounded nonsense, but Alice very 
obediently got up, and carried the dish round, 
and the cake divided itself into three pieces as 
she did so. “Now cut it up,” said the Lion, 
as she returned to her place with the empty 
dish. 

“I say, this isn’t fair!” cried the Unicorn, 
as Alice sat with the knife in her hand, very 
much puzzled how to begin. “The Monster 
has given the Lion twice as much as me!” 

“She’s kept none for herself, an5^how,” said 
the Lion. “Do you like plum-cake, Mon- 
ster?” 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


117 


But before Alice could answer him, the 
drums began. 

Where the noise came from, she couldn’t 
make out: the air seemed full of it, and it 
rang through and through her head till she 
felt quite deafened. She started to her feet 
and sprang across the little brook in her ter- 
ror, and had just time to see the Lion and the 
Unicorn rise to their feet, with angry looks at 
being interrupted in their feast, before she 
dropped to her knees, and put her hands over 
her ears, vainly trying to shut out the dread- 
ful uproar. 

“If that doesn't ‘drum them out of town,’ ’’ 
she thought to herself, “nothing ever will!’’ 


118 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


CHAPTER VIII. 

“it’s my own invention.’’ 

After a while the noise seemed gradually to 
die away, till all was dead silence, and Alice 
lifted up her head in some alarm. There was 
no one to be seen, and her first thought was 
that she must have been dreaming about the 
Lion and the Unicorn and those queer Anglo- 
Saxon Messengers. However, there was the 
great dish still lying at her feet, on which she 
had tried to cut the plum-cake, “So I wasn’t 
dreaming, after all,’’ she said to herself, 
“unless — unless we’re all part of the same 
dream. Only I do hope it’s my dream, and 
not the Red King’s! I don’t like belonging to 
another person’s dream,’’ she went on in a 
rather complaining tone: “I’ve a great mind 
to go and wake him, and see what happens!’’ 

At this moment her thoughts were inter- 
rupted by a loud shouting of “Ahoy! Ahoy! 
Check!’’ and a Knight, dressed in crimson 
armor, came galloping down upon her, bran- 
dishing a great club. Just as he reached her, 
the horse stopped suddenly: “You’re my pris- 
oner!’’ the Knight cried, as he tumbled off his 
horse. 

Startled as she was, Alice was more fright- 
ened for him than for herself at the moment, 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


119 


and watched him with some anxiety as he 
mounted again. As soon as he was comfort- 
ably in the saddle, he began once more, 

“You’re my ’’ but here another voice broke 

in, “Ahoy! Ahoy! Check!” and Alice looked 
round in some surprise for the new enemy. 

This time it was a White Knight. He drew 
up at Alice’s side, and tumbled off his horse 
just as the Red Knight had done : then he got 
on again, and the two Knights sat and looked 
at each other for some time without speaking. 

Alice looked from one to the other in some 
bewilderment. 

“She’s my prisoner, you know!” the Red 
Knight said at last. 

“Yes, but then I came and rescued her!” 
the White Knight replied. 

“Well, we must fight for her, then,” said 
the Red Knight, as he took up his helmet 
(which hung from his saddle, and was some- 
thing the shape of a horse’s head) and put it 
on. 

“You will observe the Rules of Battle, of 
course?” the White Knight remarked, putting 
on his helmet too. 

“I always do,” said the Red Knight, and 
they began banging away at each other with 
such fury that Alice got behind a tree to be 
out of the way of the blows. 

“I wonder, now, what the Rules of Battle 
are,” she said to herself, as she watched the 
fight, timidly peeping out from her hiding- 
place. “One Rule seems to be, that if one 
Knight hits the other, he knocks him off his 


120 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


horse; and, if he misses, he tumbles off him* 
self — and another Rule seems to be that they 
hold their clubs with their arms, as if they 

were Punch and Judy What a noise they 

make when they tumble! Jnst like a whole 



set of fire-irons falling into the fender! And 
how quiet the horses are ! They let them get 
on and off them just as if they were tables!” 

Another Rule of Battle, that Alice had not 
noticed, seemed to be that they always fell on 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


121 


their heads; and the battle ended with their 
both falling off in this way, side by side. 
When they got up again, they shook hands, 
and then the Red Knight mounted and gal- 
loped off. 

“It was a glorious victory, wasn’t it?” said 
the White Knight, as he came up panting. 

“I don’t know,” Alice said doubtfully. “I 
don’t want to be anybody’s prisoner. I want 
to be a Queen.” 

“So you will, when you’ve crossed the next 
brook,” said the White Knight. “I’ll see you 
safe to the end of the wood — and then I must 
go back, you know. That’s the end of my 
move. ” 

“Thank you very much,” said Alice. “May 
I help you off with your helmet?” It was 
evidently more than he could manage by him- 
self : however, she managed to shake him out 
of it at last. 

“Now one can breathe more easily,” said 
the Knight, putting back his shaggy hair with 
both hands, and turning his gentle face and 
large mild eyes to Alice. She thought she had 
never seen such a strange-looking soldier in 
all her life. 

He was dressed in tin armor, which seemed 
to fit him very badly, and he had a queer- 
shaped little deal box fastened across his 
shoulders, upside-down, and with the lid hang- 
ing open. Alice looked at it with great curi- 
osity. 

“I see you’re admiring my little box,” the 
Knight said in a friendly tone. “It’s my own 


122 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


invention — to keep clothes and sandwiches in. 
You see I carry it upside down, so that the 
rain can’t get in. ” 

“But the things can get out,” Alice gently 
remarked. “Do you know the lid’s open?” 

“I didn’t know it,” the Knight said, a 
shade of vexation passing over his face. 
“Then all the things must have fallen out! 
And the box is no use without them !” He 
unfastened it as he spoke, and was just going 
to throw it into the bushes, when a sudden 
thought seemed to strike him, and he hung it 
carefully on a tree. “Can you guess why I 
did that?” he said to Alice. 

Alice shook her head. 

“In hopes some bees may make a nest in it 
— then I should get the honey.” 

“But you’ve got a bee-hive — or something 
like one — fastened to the saddle,” said Alice. 

“Yes, it’s a very good bee-hive,” the Knight 
said in a discontented tone, “one of the best 
kind. But not a single bee has come near it 
yet. And the other thing is a mouse-trap. I 
suppose the mice keep the bees out — or the 
bees keep the mice out, I don’t know 
which. ” 

‘ ‘ I was wondering what the mouse-trap was 
for,” said Alice. “It isn’t very likely there 
would be any mice on the horse’s back.” 

“Not very likely, perhaps,” said the 
Knight; “but, if they do come, I don’t choose 
to have them running all about.” 

“You see,” he went on after a pause, “it’s 
as well to be provided for everything. That’s 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


123 


the reason the horse has all those anklets 
round his feet. ” 

“But what are they for?” Alice asked in a 
tone of great curiosity. 

“To guard against the bites of sharks,” the 
Knight replied. “It’s an invention of my 
own. And now help me on. I’ll go with you 

to the end of the wood What’s that dish 

for?” 

“It’s meant for plum-cake,” said Alice. 

“We’d better take it with us,” the Knight 
said. “It’ll come in handy if we find any 
plum-cake. Help me to get it into this bag. ” 

This took a long time to manage, though 
Alice held the bag open very carefully, be- 
cause the Knight was so very awkward in put- 
ting in the dish : the first two or three times 
that he tried he fell in himself instead. “It’s 
rather a tight fit, you see,” he said, as they 
got it in at last; “there are so many candle- 
sticks in the bag.” And he hung it to the sad- 
dle, which was already loaded with bunches of 
carrots, and fire-irons, and many other things;. 

“I hope you’ve got your hair well fastened 
on?” he continued as they set off. 

“Only in the usual way,” Alice said, smil- 
ing. 

“That’s hardly enough,” he said, anxiously. 
“You see the wind is so very strong here. 
It’s as strong as soup. ” 

“Have you invented a plan for keeping the 
hair from being blown off?” Alice inquired. 

“Not yet,” said the Knight “But I’ve got 
a plan for keeping it from falling off. ” 


124 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


‘ ‘ I should like to hear it, very much. 

“First you take an upright stick,” said the 
Knight. “Then you make your hair creep up 
it, like a fruit-tree. Now the reason hair falls 
off is because it hangs down — things never fall 



upwards, you know. It’s a plan of my own 
invention.. You may try it if you like.” 

It didn’t sound a comfortable plan, Alice 
thought, and for a few minutes she walked on 
in silence, puzzling over the idea, and every 
now and then stopping to help the poor knight, 
who certainly was not a good rider. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


125 


Whenever the horse stopped (which it did 
very often), he fell off in front; and, whenever 
it went on a^ain (which it generally did rather 
suddenly), he fell off behind. Otherwise he 
kept on pretty well, except that he had a 
habit of now and then falling off sideways; 
and, as he generally did this on the side on 
which Alice was walking, she soon found that 
it was the best plan not to walk quite close to 
the horse. 

“I’m afraid ^mu’ve not had much practice 
in riding,” she ventured to say, as she was 
helping him up from his fifth tumble. 

The Knight looked very much surprised, 
and a little offended at the remark. “What 
makes you say that?” he asked, as he scram- 
bled back into the saddle, keeping hold of 
Alice’s hair in one hand, to save himself from 
falling over on the other side. 

“Because people don’t fall off quite so often, 
when they’ve had much practice.” 

“I’ve had plenty of practice, ” the Knight 
said very gravely: “plenty of practice!” 

Alice ^ could think of nothing better to say 
than “Indeed?” but she said it as heartily as 
she could. They went on a little way in sil- 
ence after this, the Knight with his eyes shut, 
muttering to himself, and Alice watching 
anxiously for the next tumble. 

“The great art of riding,” the Knight sud- 
denl}^ began in a loud voice, waving his right 

arm as he spoke, “is to keep ” Here 

the sentence ended as suddenly as it had begun, 
as the Knight fell heavily on the top of his 


126 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


head exactly in the path where Alice was walk- 
ing. She was quite frightened this time, and 
said in an anxious tone, as she picked him up, 
*‘I hope no bones are broken?” 

“None to speak of,” the Knight said, as if 
he didn’t mind breaking two or three of them. 
“The great art of riding, as I was saying, is 
— to keep your balance properly. Like this, 
you know ’’ 

He let go the bridle, and stretched out both 
his arms to show Alice what he meant, and 
this time he fell flat on his back, right under 
the horse’s feet. 

“Plenty of practice!’’ he went on repeating, 
all the time that Alice was getting him on his 
feet again. ‘ ‘ Plenty of practice ! ’ ’ 

“It’s too ridiculous!’’ cried Alice, losing all 
her patience this time. “You ought to have a 
wooden horse on wheels, that you ought!’’ 

“Does that kind go smoothly?” the Knight 
asked in a tone of great interest, clasping his 
arms round the horse’s neck as he spoke, just 
in time to save himself from tumbling off 
again. 

“Much more smoothly than a live horse,” 
Alice said, with a little scream of laughter, in 
spite of all she could do to prevent it. 

“I’ll get one,” the Knight said thoughtfully 
to himself. “One or two — several. ” 

There was a short silence after this, and 
then the Knight went on again. “I’m a great 
hand at inventing things. Now, I daresay you 
noticed, the last time you picked me up, that 
I was looking rather thoughtful?” 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


127 


“You were a little grave,’’ said Alice. 

“Well, just then I v/as inventing a new way 
of getting over a gate — would you like to hear 
it?” 

“Very much indeed,” Alice said politely. 

“I’ll tell you how I came to think of it,” 
said the Knight. “You see, I said to myself, 
‘The only difficulty is with the feet; the head 
is high enough already. ’ Now, first I put my 
head on the top of the gate — then the head’s 
high enough — then I stand on my head — then 
the feet are high enough, you see — then I’m 
over, you see. ’ ’ 

“Yes, I suppose you’d be over when that 
was done,” Alice said thoughtfully: “but 
don’t you think it would be rather hard?” 

“I haven’t tried it yet,” the Knight said, 
gravely; “so I can’t tell for certain — but I’m 
afraid it would be a little hard. ’ ’ 

He looked so vexed at the idea, that Alice 
changed the subject hastily. “What a curious 
helmet you’ve got!” she said cheerfully. “Is 
that your invention too?” 

The Knight looked down proudly at his hel- 
met, which hung from the saddle. “Yes,” he 
said; “but I’ve invented a better one than 
that — like a sugar-loaf. When I used to wear 
it, if I fell off the horse, it always touched the 
ground directly. So I had a very little way to 
fall, you see — But there was the danger of 
falling into it, to be sure. That happened to 
me once — and the worst of it was, before I 
could get out again, the other White Knight 


128 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


came and put it on. He thought it was his 
own helmet.” 

The Knight looked so solemn about it that 
Alice did not dare to laugh. ‘‘I’m afraid you 
must have hurt him, ’ ’ she said in a trembling 
voice, ‘‘being on the top of his head.” 

“I had to kick him, of course,” the Knight 
said, very seriously. ‘‘And then he took the 
helmet off again but it took hours and hours to 



get me out. I was as fast as — as lightning, 
you know. ” 

‘‘But that’s a different kind of fastness,” 
Alice objected. 

The Knight shook his head. ‘‘It was all 
kinds of fastness with me, I can assure yon ! ’ ’ 
he said. He raised his hands in some excite- 
ment as he said this, and instantly rolled out 
of the saddle, and fell headlong into a deep 
ditch. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 129 


Alice ran to the side of the ditch to look for 
him. She was rather startled by the fall, as 
for some time he had kept on very well, and 
she was afraid that he really was hurt this 
time. However, though she could see nothing 
but the soles of his feet, she was much relieved 
to hear that he was talking on in his usual 
tone. “All kinds of fastness,” he repeated: 
“but it was careless of him to put another 
man’s helmet on — with the man in it, too.” 

“How can you go on talking so quietly, head 
downwards?” Alice asked, as she dragged him 
out by the feet, and laid him in a heap on the 
bank. 

The Knight looked surprised at the question. 
“What does it matter where my body happens 
to be?” he said. “My mind goes on working 
all the same. In fact, the more head-down- 
wards I am, the more I keep inventing new 
things. ’ ’ 

“Now the cleverest thing of the sort that I 
ever did,” he went on after a pause, “was in- 
venting a new pudding during the meat- 
course. ’ ’ 

“In time to have it cooked for the next 
course?” said Alice. “Well, that was quick 
work, certainly!” 

“Well, not the next course, ” the Knight said 
in a slow thoughtful tone; “no, certainly not 
the next course.” 

“Then it would have to be the next day. I 
suppose you wouldn’t have two pudding 
courses in one dinner?” 

“Well, not the next day, ” the Knight re- 

9 Looking Glass 


130 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


peated as before; “not the next day. In fact,” 
he went on, holding his head down, and his 
voice getting lower and lower, “I don’t believe 
that pudding ever was cooked! In fact, I 
don’t believe that pudding ever will be cooked ! 
And yet it was a very clever pudding to 
invent. ’’ 

“What did you mean it to be made of?’’ 
Alice asked, hoping to cheer him up, for the 
poor Knight seemed quite low-spirited about it. 

“It began with blotting-paper,” the Knight 
answered with a groan. 

“That wouldn’t be very nice, I’m afraid ” 

“Not very nice alone,” he interrupted, quite 
eagerly; “but you’ve no idea what a difference 
it makes, mixing it with other things — such as 
gunpowder and sealing-wax. And here I 
must leave you.” They had just come to the 
end of the wood. 

Alice could only look puzzled ; she was think- 
ing of the pudding. 

“You are sad,” the Knight said in an anx- 
ious tone; “let me sing you a song to comfort 
you. ’ ’ 

“Is it very long?” Alice asked, for she had 
heard a good deal of poetry that day. 

“It’s long,” said the Knight, “but it’s very, 
very beautiful. Everybody that hears me sing 
it — either it brings the tears into their eyes, or 
else — ” 

“Or else what?” said Alice, for the Knight 
had made a sudden pause. 

“Or else it doesn’t, you know. The name 
of the song is called ‘Haddocks’ Eyes.’ ” 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 131 


“Oh, that’s the name of the song, is it?” 
Alice said, trying to feel interested. 

“No, you don’t understand,” the Knight 
said, looking a little vexed. “That’s what the 
name'is called. The name really is ‘The Aged, 
Aged Man. ’ ” 

“Then I ought to have said ‘That’s what the 
song is called’?” Alice corrected herself. 

“No, you oughtn’t; that’s quite another 
thing! The song is called ‘Ways and Means’; 
but that’s only what it’s called, you know!” 

“Well, what is the song, then?” said Alice, 
who was by this time completely bewildered. 

“I was coming to that,” the Knight said. 
“The song really is ‘A-sitting on a Gate’; 
and the tune’s my own invention.” 

So saying, he stopped his horse and let the 
reins fall on its neck; then, slowly beating 
time with one hand, and with a faint smile 
lighting up his gentle foolish face, as if he en- 
joyed the music of his song, he began. 

Of all the strange things that Alice saw in 
her journey Through The Looking-Glass, this 
was the one that she always remembered most 
clearly. Years afterwards she could bring the 
whole scene back again, as if it had been only 
yesterday — the mild blue eyes and kindly 
smile of the Knight — the setting sun gleaming 
through his hair, and shining on his armor in 
a blaze of light that quite dazzled her — the 
horse quietly moving about, with the reins 
hanging loose on his neck, cropping the grass 
at her feet — and the black shadows of the for- 
est behind — all this she took in like a picture, 


132 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


as, with one hand shading her eyes, she leant 
against a tree, watching the strange pair, and 
listening, in a half-dream, to the melancholy 
music of the song. 

“But the tune isn’t his own invention,” she 
said to herself; “it’s ‘I give thee all, I can no 
more.’ ” She stood and listened very attent- 
ively, but no tears came into her eyes. 

“I’ll tell thee everything I can: 

There’s little to relate. 

I saw an aged aged man, 

A-sitting on a gate. 

‘Who are you, aged man?’ I said, 

‘And how is it you live?’ 

And his answer trickled through my head. 
Like water through a sieve. 

He said, ‘I look for butterflies 
That sleep among the wheat: 

I make them into mutton-pies, 

And sell them in the street. 

I sell them unto men, ’ he said, 

‘Who sail on stormy seas; 

And that’s the way I get my bread — 

A trifle, if you please. ’ 

But I was thinking of a plan 
To dye one’s whiskers green, 

And always use so large a fan 
That they could not be seen. 

So, having no reply to give 
To what the old man said, 

I cried, ‘Come, tell me how you live!’ 

And thumped him on the head. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


His accents mild took up the tale : 

He said, ‘I go my ways, 

And when I find a mountain-rill, 

I set it in a blaze ; 

And thence they make a stuff they call 
Rowland’s Macassar-Oil — 

Yet twopence-halfpenny is all 
They give me for my toil. ’ 

But I was thinking of a way 
To feed oneself on batter. 

And so go on from day to day 
Getting a little fatter. 

I shook him well from side to side. 
Until his face was blue: 

‘Come, tell me how you live,’ I cried, 
‘And what it is you do!’ 

He said, ‘ I hunt for haddocks’ eyes 
Among the heather bright. 

And work them into waistcoat-buttons 
In the silent night. 

And these I do not sell for gold 
Or coin of silvery shine. 

But for a copper halfpenny. 

And that will purchase nine. 

‘I sometimes dig for buttered rolls. 

Or set limed twigs for crabs: 

I sometimes search the grassy knolls 
For wheels of Hansom-cabs. 

And that’s the way’ (he gave a wink) 

‘ By which I get my wealth — 

And very gladly will I drink 
Your Honor’s noble health.’ 


134 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


I heard him then, for I had just 
Completed my design 
To keep the Menai bridge from rust 
By boiling it in wine. 

I thanked him much for telling me 
The way he got his wealth, 

But chiefly for his wish that he 
Might drink my noble health. 

And now, if e’er by chance I put 
My fingers into glue. 

Or madly squeeze a right-hand foot 
Into a left-hand shoe. 

Or if I drop upon my toe 
A very heavy weight, 

I weep, for it reminds me so 
Of that old man I used to know — 

Whose look was mild, whose speech was slow, 
Whose hair was whiter than the snow. 

Whose face was very like a crow. 

With eyes, like cinders, all aglow. 

Who seemed distracted with his woe, 

Who rocked his body to and fro. 

And muttered mumblingly and low, 

As if his mouth were f ull of dough. 

Who snorted like a buffalo — 

That summer evening long ago, 

A-sitting on a gate. ’ ’ 

As the Knight sang the last words of the 
ballad, he gathered up the reins, and turned 
his horse’s head along the road by which they 
had come. “You’ve only a few yards to go,’’ 
he said, “down the hill and over that little 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


135 


brook, and then youTl be a Queen— but you’ll 
stay and see me off first?” he added as Alice 
turned with an eager look in the direction to 
which he pointed. ‘‘I sha’n’t be long. You’ll 
wait and wave your handkerchief when I get 
to that turn in the road! I think it’ll encour- 
age me, you see. ” 

“Of course. I’ll wait,” said Alice; “and 
thank you very much for coming so far — and 
for the song — I liked it very much. ’ ’ 

“I hope so,” the Knight said doubtfully; 
“but you didn’t cry so much as I thought 
you would. ’ ’ 

So they shook hands, and then the Knight 
rode slowly away into the forest. “It won’t take 
long to see him off, I expect,” Alice said to 
herself, as she stood watching him. “There 
he goes! Right on his head as usual! How- 
ever, he gets on again pretty easily — that 
comes of having so many things hung round 

the horse ” So she went on talking to 

herself, as she watched the horse walking leis- 
urely along the road, and the Knight tumbling 
off, first on one side, and then on the other. 
After the fourth or fifth tumble he reached 
the turn, and then she waved her handkerchief 
to him, and waited till he was out of sight. 

“I hope it encouraged him,” she said, as she 
turned to run down the hill; “and now for 
the last brook, and to be a Queen! How 
grand it sounds ! ” A very few steps brought 
her to the edge of the brook. “The Eighth 
Square at last!” she cried as she bounded 


136 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


^ :}« * * * 

^ ^ ^ * 

across, and threw herself down to rest on a 
lawn as soft as moss, with little flower-beds 
dotted about it here and there. “Oh, how 



glad I am to get here ! And what is this on 
my head?” she exclaimed in a tone of dismay, 
as she put her hands up to something very 
heavy, that fitted tight all round her head. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


137 


“But how can it have got there without my 
knowing it?” she said to herself as she lifted 
it off, and set it on her lap to make out what 
it could possibly be. 

It was a golden crown. 


138 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


CHAPTER IX. 

QUEEN ALICE. 

“Well, this is grand!” said Alice. “I never 
expected I should be a Queen so soon — and 
ITl tell you what it is, your Majesty,” she 
went on, in a severe tone (she was always 
rather fond of scolding herself), “it’ll never 
do for you to be lolling about on the grass like 
that! Queens have to be dignified, you 
know ! ’ ’ 

So she got up and walked about — rather stifly 
just at first, as she was afraid that the crown 
might come off : but she comforted herself 
with the thought that there was nobody to see 
her, “and if I really am a Queen,” she said as 
she sat down again, “I shall be able to 
manage it quite well in time. ’ ’ 

Everything was happening so oddly that she 
didn’t feel a bit surprised at finding the Red 
Queen and the White Queen sitting close to 
her, one on each side : she would have liked 
very much to ask them how they came there, but 
she feared it would not be quite civil. How- 
ever, there would be no harm, she thought, in 
asking if the game was over. “Please, would 
you tell me — ” she began, looking timidly at 
the Red Queen. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 139 


“Speak when you’re spoken to!” the Queen 
sharply interrupted her. 

“But if everybody obeyed that rule,” said 
Alice, who was always ready for a little 
argument, “and if you only spoke when you 
were spoken to, and the other person always 
waited for you to begin, you see nobody would 
ever say anything, so that — ” 

“Ridiculous!” cried the Queen. “Why 
don’t you see, child — ” here she broke off with 
a frown, and, after thinking for a minute, 
suddenly changed the subject of the conversa- 
tion. “What do you mean by ‘If you really 
are a Queen?’ What right have you to call 
yourself so? You can’t be a Queen, you 
know, till you’ve passed the proper examina- 
tion. And the sooner we begin it, the better. ” 

‘‘I only said ‘if’!” poor Alice pleaded in a 
piteous tone. 

The two Queens looked at each other, and 
the Red Queen remarked, with a little shud- 
der, “She says she only said ‘if’ — ” 

“But she said a great deal more than that!” 
the White Queen moaned, wringing her hands. 
‘‘Oh, ever so much more than that!” 

“So you did, you know,” the Red Queen 
said to Alice. “Always speak the truth — think 
before you speak — and write it down after- 
wards.” 

“I’m sure I didn’t mean — ” Alice was 
beginning, but the Red Queen interrupted 
her impatiently. 

“That’s just what I complain of! You 
should have meant ! What do you suppose is 


140 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


the use of a child without any meaning? Even 
a joke should have some meaning — and a 
child’s more important than a joke, I hope. 
You couldn’t deny that, even if you tried with 
both hands.” 

‘‘I don't deny things with my hands,” Alice 
objected. 

“Nobody said you did, ” said the Red Queen. 
“I said you couldn’t if you tried. ” 

“She’s in that state of mind,” said the 
White Queen, “that she wants to deny some- 
thing — only she doesn’t know what to deny!” 

“A nasty, vicious temper,” the Red Queen 
remarked; and then there was an uncomfort- 
able silence for a minute or two. 

The Red Queen broke the silence by saying, 
to the White Queen, “I invite you to Alice’s 
dinner-party this afternoon.” 

The White Queen smiled feebly, and said 
“And I invite you.” 

“I didn’t know I was to have a party at all,” 
said Alice; “but, if there is to be one, I think 
I ought to invite the guests. ” 

“We gave you the opportunity of doing it,” 
the Red Queen remarked; “but I daresay 
you’ve not had many lessons in manners yet?” 

“Manners are not taught in lessons,” said 
Alice. “Lessons teach you to do sums, and 
things of that sort ” 

“Can you do Addition?” the White Queen 
asked. “What’s one and one and one and one 
and one and one and one and one and one and 
one?” 

“I don’t know,” said Alice. “Host count” 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


141 


“She can’t do Addition,’’ the Red Queen 
interrupted. “Can you do subtraction? Take 
nine from eight.’’ 

“Nine from eight I can’t, you know,’’ Alice 
replied very readily: “but — ’’ 

“She can’t do Subtraction,’’ said the White 
Queen. “Can you do Division? Divide a loaf 
by a knife — what’s the answer to that?’’ 

“I suppose — ” Alice was beginning, but the 
Red Queen answered for her. “Bread-and- 
butter, of course. Try another Subtraction 
sum. Take a bone from a dog: what 
remains?’’ 



Alice considered. “The bone wouldn’t 
remain, of course, if I took it — and the dog 
wouldn’t remain: it would come to bite me — 
and I’m sure I shouldn’t remain!’’ 

“Then you think nothing would remain?’’ 
said the Red Queen. 



142 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


“I think that’s the answer.” 

“Wrong, as usual,” said the Red Queen: 
“the dog’s temper would remain.” 

“But I don’t see how — ” 

“Why, look here!” the Red Queen cried. 
“The dog would lose its temper, wouldn’t it?’^ 

‘ ‘ Perhaps it would, ’ ’ Alice replied cautiously. 

“Then if the dog went away its temper 
would remain!” the Queen exclaimed triumph- 
antly. 

Alice said, as gravely as she could, “They 
might go different ways.” But she couldn’t 
help thinking to herself, “What dreadful 
nonsense we are talking!” 

“She can’t do sums a bit!” the Queens said 
together, with great emphasis. 

“Can you do sums?” Alice said, turning 
suddenly on the White Queen, for she didn’t 
like being found fault with so much. 

The Queen gasped and shut her eyes. “I 
can do Addition, ” she said, “if you give me 
time — but I can’t do Subtraction under any 
circumstances!” 

“Of course you know youi ABC?” said the 
Red Queen. 

“To be sure I do,” said Alice. 

“So do I,” the White Queen whispered: 
“we’ll often say it over together, dear. And 
I’ll tell you a secret — I can read words of one 
letter! Isn’t that grand? However, don’t be 
discouraged. You’ll come to it in time. ” 

Here the Red Queen began again. “Can 
you answer useful questions?” she said. 
“How is bread made?” 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 143 


“I know that!” Alice cried eagerly. “You 
take some flour — ” 

“Where do you pick the flower?” the White 
Queen asked. “ In a garden or in the hedges?” 

“Well, it isn’t picked at all,” Alice 
explained: “it’s ground — ” 

“How many acres of ground?” said the 
White Queen “You mustn’t leave out so 
many things. ” 

“Fan her head!” the Red Queen anxiously 
interrupted. “She’ll be feverish after so 
much thinking.” So they set to work and 
fanned her with bunches of leaves, till she had 
to beg them to leave off, it blew her hair about 
so. 

“She’s all right again now,” said the Red 
Queen. “Do you know languages? What’s 
the French for fiddle-de-dee?” 

“Fiddle-de-dee’s not English,” Alice replied 
gravely. 

“Who ever said it was?” said the Red Queen. 

Alice thought she saw a way out of the 
difficulty, this time. “If you’ll tell me what 
language ‘fiddle-de-dee’ is, I’ll tell you the 
French for it!” she exclaimed triumphantly. 

But the Red Queen drew herself up rather 
stiffly, and said ‘ ‘ Queens never make bargains. ’ ’ 

“I wish Queens never asked questions,” 
Alice thought to herself. 

“Don’t let us quarrel,” the White Queen 
said in an anxious tone. “What is the cause 
of lightning?” 

“The cause of lightning,” Alice said very 
decidedly, for she felt quite certain about this. 


144 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


^'is the thunder — no, no!” she hastily cor- 
rected herself. “I meant the other way. ” 

“It’s too late to correct it,” said the Red 
Queen: “when you've once said a thing, that 
fixes it, and you must take the consequences. ’ ’ 

“Which reminds me — ” the White Queen 
said, looking down and nervously clasping and 
unclasping her hands, “we had such a thunder- 
storm last Tuesday — I mean one of the last set 
of Tuesdays, you know. ’ ' 

Alice was puzzled. “In our country,” she 
remarked, “there’s only one day at a time.” 

The Red Queen said “That’s a poor thin 
way of doing things. Now here, we mostly 
have days and nights two or three at a time, 
and sometimes in the winter we take as many 
as five nights together — for warmth, you 
know. ’ ’ 

“Are five nights warmer than one night, 
then?” Alice ventured to ask. 

“Five times as warm, of course.” 

“But they should be five times as cold, by 
the same rule ” 

“Just so!” cried the Red Queen. “Five 
times as warm, and five times as cold — just as 
I’m five times as rich as you are, and five 
times as clever!” 

Alice sighed and gave it up. “It’s exactly 
like a riddle with no answer!” she thought. 

“Humpty Dumpty saw it too,” the White 
Queen went on in a low voice, more as if she 
were talking to herself. “He came to the 
door with a corkscrew in his hand ” 

“What did he want?” said the Red Queen. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 145 


“He said he would come in,” the White 
Queen went on, “because he was looking for a 
hippopotamus. Now, as it happened, there 
wasn’t such a thing in the house, that morn- 
ing.” 

‘ ‘ Is there generally?” Alice asked in an aston- 
ished tone. 

“Well, only on Thursdays,” said the Queen. 

“I know what he came for,” said Alice: “he 
wanted to punish the fish, because ” 

Here the White Queen began again. “It 
was such a thunderstorm, you can’t think!” 
(“She never could, you know,” said the Red 
Queen.) “And part of the roof came off, 
and ever so much thunder got in — and it went 
rolling round the room in great lumps — and 
knocking over the tables and things — till I was 
so frightened, I couldn’t remember my own 
name!” 

Alice thought to herself “I never should try 
to remember my name in the middle of an 
accident! Where would be the use of it?” but 
she did not say this aloud, for fear of hurting 
the poor Queen’s feelings. 

“Your Majesty must excuse her, ” the Red 
Queen said to Alice, taking one of the White 
Queen’s hands in her own, and gently strok- 
ing it: “she means well, but she can’t help 
saying foolish things, as a general rule.” 

The White Queen looked timidly at Alice, 
who felt she ought to say something kind, but 
really couldn’t think of anything at the mo- 
ment. 

“She never was really well brought up,” the 

10 Looking Glass 


146 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


Red Queen went on: “but it’s amazing how 
good-tempered she is! Pat her on the head, 
and see how pleased she’ll be!’’ But this was 
more than Alice had courage to do. 

“A little kindness — and putting her hair 
in papers — would do wonders with her ’’ 

The White Queen gave a deep sigh, and 
laid her head on Alice’s shoulder. “I am so 
sleepy ! ’ ’ she moaned. 



“She’s tired, poor thing!” said the Red 
Queen. “Smooth her hair — lend her your 
nightcap — and sing her a soothing lullaby. ’ ’ 

“I haven’t got a nightcap with me,” said 
Alice, as she tried to obey the first direction : 
“and I don’t know any soothing lullabies.” 

“I must do it myself, then,” said the Red 
Queen, and she began:- 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 147 


“Hush-a-by lady, in Alice’s lap! 

Till the feast’s ready, we’ve time for a nap. 
When the feast’s over, we’ll go to the ball — 
Red Queen, and White Queen, and Alice, 
and all! 

“And now you know the words,” she added, 
as she put her head down on Alice’s other 
shoulder, “just sing it through to me. I’m 
getting sleepy, too. ’’ In another moment both 
Queens were fast asleep, and snoring 
loud. 

“What am I to do?’’ exclaimed Alice, looking 
about in great perplexity, as first one round 
head, and then the other, rolled down from 
her shoulder, and lay like a heavy lump in her 
lap. “I don’t think it ever happened before, 
that any one had to take care of two Queens 
asleep at once ! No, not in all the History of 
England — it couldn’t, you know, because there 
never was more than one Queen at a time. 
Do wake up, you heavy things!’’ she went on 
in an impatient tone ; but there was no answer 
but a gentle snoring. 

The snoring got more distinct every minute, 
and sounded more like a tune: at last she 
could even make out words, and she listened 
so eagerly that, when the two great heads sud- 
denly vanished from her lap, she hardly missed 
them. 

She was standing before an arched doorway, 
over which were the words “QUEEN ALICE” 
in large letters, and on each side of the arch 
there was a bell-handle; one was marked 


148 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


“Visitors’ Bell,” and the other “Servants’ 
Bell.” 

“I’ll wait till the song’s over,’’ thought 
Alice, “and then I’ll ring the — the — which 
bell must I ring?’’ she went on, very much 
puzzled by the names. “I’m not a visitor, 
and I’m not a servant. There ought to be 
one marked ‘Queen,’ you know ’’ 

Just then the door opened a little way, and 
a creature with a long beak put its head out 
for a moment and said “No admittance till 
the week after next!” and shut the door again 
with a bang. 

Alice knocked and rang in vain for a long 
time; but at last a very old Frog, who was 
sitting under a tree, got up and hobbled slowly 
towards her: he was dressed in bright yellow, 
and had enormous boots on. 

“What is it, now?’’ the Frog said in a deep 
hoarse whisper. 

Alice turned round, ready to find fault with 
anybody. “Where’s the servant whose busi- 
ness it is to answer the door?’’ she began 
angrily. 

“Which door?’’ said the Frog. 

Alice almost stamped with irritation at the 
slow drawl in which he spoke. “This door, 
of course!” 

The Frog looked at the door with his large 
dull eyes for a minute : then he went nearer 
and rubbed it with his thumb, as if he were 
trying whether the paint would come off : then 
he looked at Alice. 

“To answer the door?’’ he said. “What’s it 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


149 


been asking of?” He was so hoarse that Alice 
could scarcely hear him. 

“I don’t know what you mean,” she said. 



“I speaks English, doesn’t I?” the Frog went 
on. “Or are you deaf? What did it ask you?” 

“Nothing!” Alice said impatiently. “I’ve 
been knocking at it!” 

“Shouldn’t do that — shouldn’t do that ” 



150 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


the Frog muttered. “Wexes it, you know.’' 
Then he went up and gave the door a kick with 
one of his great feet. “You let it alone,’’ he 
panted out, as he hobbled back to his tree, 
“and it’ll let you alone, you know. ’’ 

At this moment the door was flung open, 
and a shrill voice was heard singing : — 

“To the Looking-Glass world it was Alice that 
said 

T’ve a sceptre in hand I’ve a crown on my 
head. 

Let the Looking-Glass creatures, whatever 
they be 

Come and dine with the Red Queen, the White 
Queen, and me!’ ’’ 

And hundreds of voices joined in the chorus: — 

“Then fill up the glasses as quick as you can. 
And sprinkle the table with buttons and bran : 
Put cats in the coffee, and mice in the tea — 
And welcome Queen Alice with thirty-times- 
three!’’ 

Then followed a confused noise of cheering, 
and Alice thought to herself “Thirty times 
three makes ninety. I wonder if any one’s 
counting?” In a minute there was silence 
again, and the same shrill voice sang another 
verse : — 

“ ‘O Looking-Glass creatures,’ quoth Alice, 
‘draw near! 

’Tis an honor to see me, a favor to hear: 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 151 


’Tis a privilege high to have dinner and tea 

Along with the Red Queen, the White Queen, 
and me!’ ” 

Then came the chorus again : — 

"‘Then fill up the glasses with treacle and ink, 

Or anything else that is pleasant to drink: 

Mix sand with the cider, and wool with the 
wine — 

And welcome Queen Alice with ninety-times- 
nine ! ’ ’ 


“Ninety times nine!” Alice repeated in 
despair. “Oh, that’ll never be done! I’d 

better go in at once ” and in she went, 

and there was a dead silence the moment she 
appeared. 

Alice glanced nervously along the table, as 
she walked up the large hall, and noticed that 
there were about fifty guests, of all kinds: 
some were animals, some birds, and there were 
even a few flowers among them. “I’m glad 
they’ve come without waiting to be asked,” 
she thought: “I should never have known 
who were the right people to invite!” 

There were three chairs at the head of the 
table : the Red and White Queens had already 
taken two of them, but the middle one was 
empty. Alice sat down in it, rather uncom- 
fortable at the silence, and longing for some 
one to speak. 

At last the Red Queen began. “You’ve 
missed the soup and fish,” she said. “Put 


152 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 

on the joint!” And the waiters set a leg of 
mutton before Alice, who looked at it rather 
anxiously, as she had never had to carve a 
joint before. 

“You look a little shy: let me introduce 
you to that leg of mutton,” said the Red 

Queen. “Alice Mutton: Mutton Alice.” 

The leg of mutton got up in the dish and 
made a little bow to Alice ; and Alice returned 
the bow, not knowing whether to be fright- 
ened or amused. 

“May I give you a slice?” she said, taking 
up the knife and fork, and looking from one 
Queen to the other. 

“Certainly not,” the Red Queen said, very 
decidedly: “it isn’t etiquette to cut any one 
you’ve been introduced to. Remove the 
joint!” And the waiters carried it off, and 
brought a large plum-pudding in its place. 

“I won’t be introduced to the pudding, 
please,” Alice said rather hastily, “or we shall 
get no dinner at all. May I give you some?” 

But the Red Queen looked sulky, and 
growled “Pudding Alice: Alice Pudd- 

ing! Remove the pudding!” and the waiters 
took it away so quickly that Alice couldn’t 
return its bow. 

However, she didn’t see why the Red Queen 
should be the only one to give orders ; so, as 
an experiment, she called out “Waiter! Bring 
back the pudding!” and there it was again 
in a moment, like a conjuring-trick. It was so 
large that she couldn’t help feeling a little shy 
with it, as she had been with the mutton; 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 153 


however, she conquered her shyness by a 
great effort, and cut a slice and handed it to 
the Red Queen. 

“What impertinence!” said the Pudding. 
“I wonder how you’d like it, if I were to cut a 
slice out of you, you creature ! ’ ’ 

It spoke in a thick, suety sort of voice, and 
Alice hadn’t a word to say in reply: she could 
only sit and look at it and gasp. 

“Make a remark, ” said the Red Queen: “it’s 
ridiculous to leave all the conversation to the 
pudding!” 

“Do you know, I’ve had such a quantity of 
poetry repeated to me to-day,” Alice began, a 
little frightened at finding that, the moment 
she opened her lips, there was dead silence, 
and all eyes were fixed upon her; “and it’s a 
very curious thing, I think — every poem was 
about fishes in some way. Do you know why 
they’re so fond of fishes, all about here?” 

She spoke to the Red Queen, whose answer 
was a little wide of the mark. “As to fishes,” 
she said, very slowly and solemnly, putting her 
mouth close to Alice’s ear, “her White Majesty 
knows a lovely riddle — all in poetry — all about 
fishes. Shall she repeat it?” 

“Her Red Majesty’s very kind to mention 
it,” the White Queen murmured into Alice’s 
other ear, in a voice like the cooing of a 
pigeon. “It would be such a treat! May I?” 

‘ ‘ Please do, ’ ’ Alice said very politely. 

The White Queen laughed with delight, and 
stroked Alice’s cheek. Then she began: 


154 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 

“ ‘First, the fish must be caught.’ 

That is easy: a baby, I think, could have 
caught it. 

‘Next, the fish must be bought.’ 

That is easy: a penny, I think, would have 
bought it. 

‘Now cook me the fish!’ 

That is easy, and will not take more than a 
minute. 

‘Let it lie in a dish!’ 

That is easy, because it already is in it. 

‘ Bring it here ! Let me sup!’ 

It is easy to set such a dish on the table. 

‘Take the dish-cover up!’ 

Ah, that is so hard that I fear I’m unable! 

For it holds it like glue — 

Holds the lid to the dish, while it lies in the 
middle : 

Which is easiest to do. 

Un-dish-cover the fish, or dishcover the 
riddle?” 


“Take a minute to think about it, and then 
guess,” said the Red Queen. “Meanwhile, 
we’ll drink your health — Queen Alice’s 
health!” she screamed at the top of her voice, 
and all the guests began drinking it directly, 
and very queerly they managed it ; some of 
them put their glasses upon their heads like 
extinguishers, and drank all that trickled 
down their faces — others upset the decanters, 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 155 


and drank the wine as it ran off the edges of 
the table — and three of them (who looked like 
kangaroos) scrambled into the dish of roast 
mutton, and began eagerly lapping up the 
gravy, “just like pigs in a trough!” thought 
Alice. 

“You ought to return thanks in a neat 
speech,” the Red Queen said, frowning at 
Alice as she spoke. 

“We must support you, you know,” the 
White Queen whispered, as Alice got up to do 
it, very obediently, but a little frightened. 

“Thank you very much,” she whispered in 
reply, “but I can do quite well without.” 

“That wouldn’t be at all the thing,” the 
Red Queen said very decidedly; so Alice tried 
to submit to it with a good grace. 

(“And they did push so!” she said after- 
wards, when she was telling her sister the his- 
tory of the feast. “You would have thought 
they wanted to squeeze me flat!”) 

In fact, it was rather difficult for her to keep 
in her place while she made her speech : the 
two Queens pushed her so, one on each side, 
that they nearly lifted her up into the air. “I 

rise to return thanks ” Alice began: and 

she really did rise as she spoke, several inches; 
but she got hold of the edge of the table, and 
managed to pull herself down again. 

‘ ‘ Take care of yourself ! ’ ’ screamed the White 
Queen, seizing Alice’s hair with both her 
hands. ‘ ‘ Something’s going to happen ! ’ ’ 

And then (as Alice afterwards described it) 
all sorts of things happened in a moment 


156 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


The candles all grew up to the ceiling, looking 
something like a bed of rushes with fireworks 
at the top. As to the bottles, they each took 
a pair of plates, which they hastily fitted on 
as wings, and so, with fork for legs went flut- 
tering about in all directions; “and very like 
birds they look,” Alice thought to herself, as 
well as she could in the dreadful confusion 
that was beginning. 

At this moment she heard a hoarse laugh at 
her side, and turned to see what was the mat- 
ter with the White Queen ; but, instead of the 
Queen, there was the leg of mutton sitting in 
the chair. “Here I am!” cried a voice from 
the soup- tureen, and Alice turned again, just 
in time to see the Queen’s broad gooinatured 
face grinning at her for a moment over the 
edge of the tureen, before she disappeared 
into the soup. 

There was not a moment to be lost. Already 
several of the quests were lying down in the 
dishes, and the soup-ladle was walking up the 
table towards Alice’s chair, and beckoning to 
her impatiently to get out of its way. 

“I can’t stand this any longer,’’ she cried, 
as she jumped up and seized the tablecloth 
with both hands; one good pull, and plates, 
dishes, guests, and candles came crashing down 
together in a heap on the floor. 

“And as for you,” she went on, turning 
fiercely upon the Red Queen, whom she con- 
sidered as the cause of all the mischief — but 
the Queen was no longer at her side — she had 
suddenly dwindled down to the size of a little 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 157 



doll, and was now on 
the table merrilyrun- 
ning round and round 
after her own shawl, 
which was trailing 
behind her. 

At any other time, 
Alice would have 
felt surprised at this, 
but she was far too 
much excited to be 
surprised at anything 
now. “As for you,” 
repeated, catch- 


sn( 



158 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


ing hold of the little creature in the very act 
of jumping over a bottle which had just 
lighted upon the table, “I’ll shake you into 
a kitten, that I will!” 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 159 



160 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


CHAPTER X. 

SHAKING. 

She took her off the table as she spoke, and 
shook her backwards and forwards with all her 
might. 

The Red Queen made no resistance what- 
ever; only her face grew very small, and her 
eyes got large and green ; and still, as Alice 
went on shaking her, she kept on growing 
shorter — and fatter — and softer — and rounder 
— and — 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


161 


I 


CHAPTER XL 

WAKING. 

— and it really was a kitten, after all. 


11 Looking Glasi 


162 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 163 


CHAPTER XII. 

WHICH DREAMED IT? 

“Your Red Majesty shouldn’t purr so loud,” 
Alice said, rubbing her eyes, and addressing 
the kitten, respectfully, yet with some sever- 
ity. ‘‘You woke me out of oh! such a nice 
dream! And you’ve been along with me, 
Kitty — all through the Looking-Glass world. 
Did you know it, dear?” 

It is a very inconvenient habit of kittens 
(Alice had once made the remark) that, what- 
ever you say to them, they always purr. ‘‘If 
they would only purr for ‘yes,’ and mew for 
‘no,’ or any rule of that sort,” she had said, 
‘‘so that one could keep up a conversation! 
But how can you talk with a person if they 
always say the same thing?” 

On this occasion the kitten only purred ; and 
it was impossible to guess whether it meant 
‘‘yes” or ‘‘no. ” 

So Alice hunted among the chessmen on the 
table till she had found the Red Queen ; then 
she went down on her knees on the hearth- 
rug, and put the kitten and the Queen to look 
at each other. ‘‘Now, Kitty!” she cried, clap- 
ping her hands triumphantly. ‘‘Confess that 
was what you turned into!” 


164 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


(“But it wouldn’t look at it,” she said, when 
she was explaining the thing afterwards to her 
sister; “it turned away its head, and pretended 
not to see it ; but it looked a little ashamed of 
itself, so I think it must have been the Red 
Queen.”) 



“Sit up a little more stiffly, dear!” Alice 
cried with a merry laugh. “And curtsey 
while you’re thinking what to — what to purr. 
It saves time, remember!” And she caught 
it up and gave it one little kiss,” just in honor 
of its having been a Red Queen. ’ ’ 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


165 


“Snowdrop, my pet!” she went on, looking 
over her shoulder at the White Kitten, which 
was still patiently undergoing its toilet, “when 
will Dinah have finished with your White 
Majesty, I wonder? That must be the reason 
you were so untidy in my dream — Dinah ! Do 
you know that you’re scrubbing a White 
Queen? Really, it’s most disrespectful of 
you! 

“And what did Dinah turn to I wonder?’’ 
she prattled on, as she settled comfortably* 
down, with one elbow on the rug, and her chin 
in her hand, to watch the kittens. ‘ ‘ Tell me, 
Dinah, did you turn to Humpty Dumpty? I 
think you did — however, you’d better not men- 
tion it to your friends just yet, for I’m not 
sure. 

“By the way, Kitty, if only you’d been 
really with me in my dream, there was one 
thing you would have enjoyed — I had such a 
quantity of poetry said to me, all about fishes ! 
To-morrow morning you shall have a real treat. 
All the time you’re eating your breakfast. I’ll 
repeat ‘The Walrus and the Carpenter’ to you; 
and then you can make believe it’s oysters, 
dear! 

“Now, Kitty, let’s consider who it was that 
dreamed it all. This is a serious question, my 
dear, and you should not go on licking your 
paw like that — as if Dinah hadn’t washed you 
this morning! You see, Kitty, it must have 
been either me or the Red King. He was 
part of my dream, of course — but then I was 
part of his dream, too ! Was it the Red King, 


166 THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 

Kitty? You were his wife, my dear, so you 
ought to know — Oh, Kitty, do help to settle it! 
I’m sure your paw can wait!” But the pro- 
voking kitten only began on the other paw, 
and pretended it hadn’t heard the question. 
Which do you think it was? 


THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS. 


167 


A boat, beneath a sunny sky 
Lingering onward dreamily 
In an evening of July — 

Children three that nestle near, 
Eager eye and willing ear. 

Pleased a simple tale to hear — 

Long has paled that sunny sky : 
Echoes fade and memories die : 
Autumn frosts have slain July. 

Still she haunts me, phantomwise, 
Alice moving under skies 
Never seen by waking eyes. 

Children yet, the tale to hear, 
Eager eye and willing ear. 
Lovingly shall nestle near. 

In a Wonderland they lie, 
Dreaming as the days go by. 
Dreaming as the summers die : 

Ever drifting down the stream — 
Lingering in the golden gleam — 
Life, what is it but a dream? 


THE END. 


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Byron 

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Dickens 

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Emerson 

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Jerome 

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Thos. a’Kempis 

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130 Sesame and Lilies Buskin 

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133. Stickit Minister Crockett 


140. Tales from Shakespeare 

C. and Mary Lamb 

141. Tanglewood Tales. . Ha^horne 

142. True and Beautiful.... Buskin 

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144. Through the Looking Glass 

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145. Treasure Island Stevenson 

146. Twice Told Tales. .Hawthorne 

160. Uncle Tom’s Cabin Stowe 

164. Vicar of Wakefield. .Goldsmith 

168. Whittier’s Poems. .. .Whittier 

169. Wide, Wide World ....Warner 

160. Window in Thrums Barrie 

161. Wonder Book Hawthorne 



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